Even the best students sometimes need a break. However, teachers and nurses are very good at recognizing false patients. So how can you get kicked out of school to take advantage of a day off? You can fake a contagious disease or pretend you have an embarrassing disease. However, no matter which option you choose, you need to be willful and consistent. And very soon, you'll find yourself at home watching TV instead of working in class.
Method 1 of 4: Pretend you have an embarrassing illness
Step 1. Pick an embarrassing illness
You should choose a disease that is known, but that many people would be hard pressed to admit. This will give your plan more credibility. In fact, the nurse or school staff will think it's unlikely that you would admit to having a troublesome illness if it wasn't important. Say you are suffering:
- excessive gas
Step 2. Get ready to talk to the teacher
You need to convince your teacher when telling him or her that you are not feeling well, but before doing so, be sure to make your story more believable, for example by going to the bathroom several times. Space your bathroom breaks by about 20 to 30 minutes, and if your teacher asks questions, tell them you're not feeling well.
Step 3. Approach your teacher privately
After doing a few laps in the bathroom, you can talk to your teacher. Remember, you have to approach the problem with a feeling of shame. So try to have a private conversation with your teacher. Do not come directly to him to tell him that you have diarrhea or intestinal gas. On the contrary, proceed in another way.
- Say this: “I have been to the bathroom several times today and I have an upset stomach. The more I go, the more it hurts. I just wanna lie down for awhile. "
- Express yourself like this, “Excuse me if I'm just going to the bathroom. I am terribly embarrassed, but I still have gas. It is very serious and I would not want my comrades to laugh at me. "
Step 4. Stick to your story
You are likely to run into some obstacles before you get sent home. The last obstacle before obtaining satisfaction will be to face the nurse or the school employees. As long as you don't change your story and keep playing comedy, you're probably going to be sent home shortly.
- Emphasize that your stomach hurts and you want to lie down for a while.
- You can buy yourself some kind of spray that gives off a gas reminiscent of a bad fart smell and use it discreetly. This type of spray device is sold in joke and trick shops, magic shops and on Internet sites.
Method 2 of 4: Fake a fever
Step 1. Control your symptoms
One of the real signs that you're sick is getting your temperature checked, which is essential for faking a fever. If you claim to have too many symptoms, like headaches, dizziness, and nausea, you will definitely get caught. It is best to fake only one symptom, such as a headache, and experience only one feeling associated with that symptom. For example, you could say one of these sentences.
- “I have a headache and every time I get up I feel a little dizzy. This has never happened to me before. Do you find this to be normal? I do not feel good. "
- “My stomach hurts and I really don't know why. It actually started last night and this morning I went to the bathroom several times. Can I lie down for a while? "
Step 2. Get access to the infirmary
Once you have successfully accessed the infirmary, you will only have a few steps left to reach your goal. The thermometer will be your key to getting you kicked out of school. Stick to your symptoms. Now that you are out of the classroom you should tell the nurse that you are hot and want her to take your temperature.
Step 3. Raise your temperature
To do this, you need to be a little discreet and organize yourself. You should make sure that the nurse does not even suspect that you have raised your temperature yourself. If she suspects anything, your chances of getting kicked out of school are next to zero. Be careful not to heat up too much. Ideally, your temperature should be between 37.5 ° C and 37.78 ° C. Here are some tips that will help you achieve this.
- Do a little exercise on your way to the infirmary. This can artificially raise your temperature.
- Drink hot water before you go.
- Hold the thermometer near a heat source, such as a lamp.
Step 4. Repeat your symptoms
Consistency is a key factor. Repeating your symptoms will make the situation more believable. Telling the same thing over and over again to the nurse or a school worker, you are more likely to be sent, even if your temperature is normal.
Step 5. Keep Calm
When you hear those sweet words, “We are going to call your parents,” it's easy to lose hope. If you expose your game and reveal that you are not actually sick by rejoicing, you may never use this trick again or you may even be in trouble.
Method 3 of 4: Fake a contagious disease
Step 1. Understand your school regulations
Although the rules may differ from school to school, in general, when a student suffers from an infectious disease, they will be sent home so as not to infect others. Conjunctivitis is ideal for your plan because this disease is extremely contagious and easy to fake.
Step 2. Take what you need
You should put your equipment in your locker and use it at a certain time of the day, for example when you go to the bathroom or between two lessons. You will need a:
- hair gel
Step 3. Apply your product
If you use lipstick you just need to put on a tiny bit, not too much or you could get caught right away. Do it in the bathroom. Lightly apply lipstick to the lids of one eye. If you opt for the styling gel, once again apply just a very small amount to the lids of one eye.
Step 4. Find yourself a scapegoat
If you say out of the blue that you have conjunctivitis, your teacher or nurse may have doubts. On the other hand, if you have someone you can blame, like a cousin you visited over the weekend or your little brother who is still in preschool, your story will be more believable.
Method 4 of 4: Induce vomiting with ipecac syrup
Step 1. Buy ipecac syrup
This emetic agent is available at most local pharmacies. Ipecac syrup is made from a plant that contains chemicals that irritate the digestive tract and make the brain think you want to throw up.
It is a convincing way to obtain satisfaction. Your teacher will not suspect a thing and will find it necessary to send you home
Step 2. Follow label directions
Depending on the brand of ipecac syrup you purchase and how it is administered, there may be special instructions you need to keep in mind. Taking too much of this syrup can have serious health effects, including possible damage to your heart and muscles.
Step 3. Drink a full glass of water
As a general rule, you should take a glass full of water, or even two (250 ml or 500 ml), for the syrup of ipecac to work more. It can be a great idea to keep your ipecac syrup in your locker. You will be able to ask your permission to leave the class to drink water or to recover a notebook and to take advantage of this moment to take your syrup.
Step 4. Avoid taking milk and soft drink
Milk and even dairy products can reduce the action of ipecac syrup. So avoid taking it. Soft drinks, on the other hand, can make your stomach bloat, which can cause discomfort.
Step 5. Take a second dose
Usually, the ipecac syrup should work and make you vomit within half an hour or less. If not, you can take a second dose with the same amount of water again.
Do not exceed the amount of syrup recommended on the label
Step 6. Consider throwing up in class
While you can get kicked home by just going to the bathroom to throw up, if you want to be odds, you can try throwing up in class in front of the teacher. Since the syrup of ipecac works quickly, make sure you have easy and quick access to a trash can.
- Be careful not to get caught when you pretend sick. If you are caught, you will have a hard time faking an illness the next few times and risk being punished.
- You can also take candy or sugarless gum to induce diarrhea. Remember, this is going to make you really sick!