In the great game of romantic relationships, girls often seek to be desired by playing difficult to gauge the boy's level of commitment and get him to fight to conquer her. Sometimes a girl can pretend to be very busy before agreeing to a date or take too long to react to someone's advances. But how do you know if a girl is trying to be wanted or if she is just not interested in your proposal?
Part 1 of 2: know if a girl is looking to be wanted
Step 1. Make your offer to her and see if she answers you openly with a "no"
It's a tactic she uses to make you chase whatever little hope is in store for you. She may tell you that she is very busy, but suddenly becomes free another day. She may tell you that she doesn't want to go out, but is constantly telling you about a place she would like to visit. Or, she tells you that she is not ready to commit to a relationship while asking you to wait and see.
- A categorical and definitive rejection expressed by a "no" means that she is not interested. In this case, she will not give you any hope and will not try to contact you again.
- Learn to step aside and discern when to stop wooing someone. If you insistently ask a girl on a date multiple times, you will turn silly and look desperate.
Step 2. Try to contact her and notice how long it takes to respond
If she always takes all of her time to answer your calls or messages, even just to say "hi", it means that she is trying to be desired. In addition, when she answers you, she begins by apologizing by telling you how very busy she is. She might tell you that she was at a party or hanging out with a friend. In fact, she's trying to show you that she's a busy girl and doesn't need you too much for fun.
- His late responses must be consistent and appear strategic. If, on the other hand, she doesn't answer you for days or comes up with a weird excuse, it's probably because she isn't really interested and isn't even shy about giving you an answer.
- Be aware, however, that some girls take time to answer calls or messages. Do not dramatize the situation or take offense at such a girl. If you see any signs that she is interested in you, be understanding and be aware that sometimes someone can be really busy or forgotten.
Step 3. Notice if it puts you in a competitive situation
A girl who seeks to be desired will want to "appear" difficult to conquer. She puts you in a competitive situation to show you that she has many choices available to her and that she can be conquered by another boy at any time.
- For example, she might come to a party with attractive friends just to make you jealous.
- She may also tease you by telling you about the people who tried to court her, but were unsuccessful. She will seem like she wants to ridicule them, but in reality, she is just trying to appear attractive to you.
- If she talks seriously to you about someone she's dating right now, it's clear that you don't attract her and that she just sees you as a friend. Don't see this as a failure, but rather the start of a great friendship. However, some people cannot stand a simple friendship with someone they are attracted to, so if you are, know when to accept defeat and set off to look for someone else.
Part 2 of 2: Find out if a girl is really interested in you
Step 1. Observe the signs of flirting
When a girl is difficult, it means that she is interested in you. And if it really is, she'll send you little signs that prove you're attracted to her. It's not very easy to tell if a girl is flirting, so pay close attention and observe body language for signs of flirting.
- She is constantly touching you. For example, she touches your shoulder or arm while talking to you. Maybe she is leaning very close to you or resting her body against yours. There are many excuses and reasons that can be found for why you touch yourself so much.
- She smiles at you all the time. As soon as she meets your eyes, she gives you a tender and spontaneous smile.
- She makes gestures that draw your attention to her body. For example, she can bite her lip, braid her hair, etc. It is possible that she is doing it consciously or unconsciously, but all of these gestures draw your attention to certain parts of her body.
- She gives you a special embrace. If she's not usually very clingy, it'll be easier to know that the hug she's given you is special. It's an excuse to get closer to you and an expression of his affection. Even if you're not sure it's a special hug, express how happy you were to have been the object of such a loving gesture from her.
Step 2. Pay attention to how she talks to you
A girl who is interested in you will tend to give you subtle suggestions every now and then when she talks to you. A simple "hi" can express an intention of seduction if you are attentive to the way she says it.
- She laughs at all your stupid jokes. You could tell the same joke to your friends and elicit only a modest laugh from them, but the difference is that she finds it "hilarious." She wants to make you feel like you're her center of attention, but don't mistake that for awkward laughter.
- She constantly gives you compliments. From his point of view, you are fun, kind, and good looking. However, be aware that some girls will instead do the opposite by insulting you. It is also an ancient technique that was used by many people. Its purpose is to reduce the self-esteem of the person being insulted and to make the insultor more attractive. Don't mistakenly conclude that a girl who does this doesn't like you. A few non-offensive slurs don't hurt, but if she throws hurtful slurs at you all the time, she doesn't really like you.
Step 3. Observe how she behaves in front of you and in front of others
She can change completely when she is in front of you. Even if she becomes nervous, extremely distant, or intriguing, a change in behavior can be a sign of a special feeling towards you.
- You can know the normal behavior of a girl when she is with her friends. If possible, observe her without her knowing it. See if she suddenly changes when she sees you. For example, she may sit up, become more calm and serious, or even appear very happy when she sees you.
- Observe how her friends react when you are in their midst. If they whisper to each other as they sneak past or glance at you frequently, chances are they were talking about you and are now trying to rate you.
- Don't quickly conclude that a change in attitude necessarily means she likes you. She may try to be desired or just be indifferent.
Step 4. Also play the part of the one who seeks to be desired
If you're still unsure of a girl's position, take control of the game and play the tricky too. But only do this when you are certain that a girl is trying to be desired when she is genuinely interested in you, otherwise this tactic will not be effective.
- Flirt with her by reserving yourself. Leave some doubts in her mind so that she too wonders if you are really in love with her. It adds a bit of suspense to the situation and makes things interesting and exciting.
- Keep your mystery. Give her just a few bits of information about yourself and let her develop curiosity about you. Thus, you will look intriguing and more attractive.
- Some girls will not like this approach even if they are playing the same game themselves. After all, the goal of the one who wants to be wanted is to get the person who is interested in her to go out of her way. to see her. So, play by agreeing to abide by his rules and show him that you are ready to do anything to gain his affection.
Step 5. Take a step back and give him time to think
In principle, you should let her decide when and how she wants to respond to you. The worst thing you can do is obsess over a girl. Such an obsession will cause you to lose control and fall into harassment.
No means no.
If she rejects your advances and tells you to stop contacting her, respect her decision and stop everything.
- Don't run after her or ask for her attention all the time.
- Do not stalk her, her friends either, in order to obtain information.
- Be natural. It wouldn't be to your advantage if a girl fell in love with a made-up character. This does not lead to a serious, lasting relationship, and playing a role that is unlike you is exhausting for yourself in the long run.
- See when a girl goes a little "too much" and exaggerates in her role as a difficult girl. If she is making things very difficult in a way that makes you look ridiculous, turn around and reconsider your intentions for her. Your time is just as precious as the girl you want.
- Once you've both agreed to start a relationship, stop playing picky. Now is the time to show her who you are and get to know her. Treat her with all the love and respect she deserves.
- If you still have doubts about her feelings for you, one of the most effective ways is to tell her that you love her. It can be scary, but by doing it you save yourself the hell of endless guesswork and have the opportunity to move forward one way or another.
- There are exceptions to the indices listed above. Not all girls will use the same tactics to get themselves wanted. To do this, treat each girl individually and uniquely.
- Any romantic relationship must be built on mutual consent. Each must be sure that the other is okay with doing this or that. This is even more true when it comes to engaging in sexual activity together. Consent must be voluntary, enthusiastic and verbal, a "YES". Love is not a game. If a girl is complicated before starting a relationship, it won't be easier afterwards, on the contrary …