How to meet girls (with pictures)

How to meet girls (with pictures)
How to meet girls (with pictures)

A lot of men know how to go about meeting girls, but they often have a hard time explaining how they go about it. This guide was designed to help less fortunate (heterosexual) boys understand some of the basics of the dating game so that they can hear the word "yes" much more often when inviting a girl out. go out the first time.


Part 1 of 5: The basics

Pick Up a Girl Step 1

Step 1. Broaden your horizon

Don't put yourself in barriers by thinking that you will only be able to find a girl if you go out to a party, to a bar or a pub. You can never know when or where you are going to meet a girl who would go out with you for a night out if you know how to ask her to. The expression “there are plenty of fish in the sea” illustrates this fact perfectly. If you want to find a girl to invite her out, keep your two eyes peeled wherever you can be: at work, in a cafe, on the street, in fact just about any public place. That being said, there is a few important things to keep in mind.

  • You will have a lot of trouble flirting at the supermarket. Most people don't go to the supermarket or the bank hoping to find a soul mate, which is why popular wisdom teaches that it is easier to meet people in bars, clubs or restaurants. evenings. Don't expect a positive response if you try to pick up girls in places they've been because they had no other choice.
  • Instead of those places, think of outdoor markets, cafes, and other places people go because they want to go out. The girls you find in these places are more likely to be more receptive to meeting new people, because they have nothing more important to do there.
  • Unless you're trying to compete with Dom Juan (note that you couldn't do it anyway), do the “ring test” before you start dating a girl. Can you see a wedding ring or any other form of ring with a diamond on its left or right ring finger? If so, she is probably married (if there is a ring on her left hand) or engaged (if she has a ring on her right hand). Don't insist and leave her alone.
Pick Up a Girl Step 2

Step 2. Understand the male-female dynamic (in a heterosexual relationship)

This can change dramatically from country to country, but as a rule it is always more or less the same in the Western world (i.e. in Europe, Australia and North America) which both men and women find attractive in members of the opposite sex. It's actually very complicated, but to put it simply, it works like this: women are first drawn to power and social influence, men are first drawn to fertility and good health (i.e. is why Western culture is obsessed with women who look young).

  • There are a multitude of things men can do to simulate social power and therefore become more attractive. Consider forging a sophisticated dress style or a keen sense of humor. A conspicuous fortune is also a mark of social power, which is the reason why many men own an expensive car when they do not have enough money to buy food. Think about ways you can use to showcase your own strengths.
  • The easiest, and probably the most useful way to show your social power is to show that you are sure of yourself. If you can show that you can talk and behave like a confident man then you will show that you have nothing to fear from other men and that will make you look stronger. That's why you'll often hear that your biggest asset when dating is your self-confidence. Have confidence in yourself and all other tips for dating girls will become just small details. On the other hand, if you don't show that you are sure of yourself, it will still be difficult for you to invite girls on a date.
Pick Up a Girl Step 3

Step 3. Be yourself, but be the best of yourself

It is important that you avoid pretending. Women have an eye for it and won't take you seriously if you disrespect them into believing you are someone else. On the other hand, women aren't looking to get your life in order either. One of the best benefits of a long-term relationship is that you can freely share your worries and fears with the person you love, but right now you are not in a long-term relationship, you are wash your dirty laundry next to a girl with a cute smile and you've got a funny t-shirt. Don't lose sight of your goal. During your conversation, you have the opportunity to show her all that is good about you, don't use it to unpack all your problems to a girl who has been kind enough to listen to you.

Pick Up a Girl Step 4

Step 4. Perfect your body language

You don't just have to stand up straight and look her in the eye to call it body language. It's a whole, all the little things you do to communicate without using the words that come out of your mouth. Body language is the basic means that humans use to communicate their emotional states to each other, making it a "language" that you need to know if you are to be good at speaking. dredge. Here are the most important rules:

  • make eye contact,
  • smile while looking at her. Don't look away until you've smiled at him,
  • do not stare at her. Try not to look at other parts of his body, other than his eyes, when talking to him.
  • take an open position: legs and arms uncrossed, shoulders back, head straight. It makes you seem confident, relaxed and attentive,
  • don't mumble. Speak clearly and without hesitation,
  • Lean slightly towards the person you are interested in while talking to them. You can also bring your head slightly forward if you are seated.
Pick Up a Girl Step 5

Step 5. Never forget:

body language is a powerful tool, but it is not always clear. For example, people tend to touch the parts of their body that they find attractive when they find themselves in front of someone they like. A girl who spends her time touching her lips or breasts while talking to you might be attracted to you, but lo and behold, it might just be that this place itches. Take with a grain of salt whatever evidence you think you see.

Pick Up a Girl Step 6

Step 6. Remember this saying:

nothing ventured, nothing gained. If you liked this girl, wouldn't you want her to tell you rather than find out three years from now? Girls think the same way. This is why you will hardly ever find success in trying to get yourself the right favors from this woman to win her heart. Women want a man who will come and tell them in their face what he feels for her. If you like her enough to want to invite her out, you should risk a negative response and give it a try.

  • Not every woman you like is going to wait forever for you to invite them out. They'll either think you don't like you and give up, or think you're not that attractive because you don't have the courage to invite them out.
  • When you feel attracted to a girl, if you don't invite her out the same day you realize you like her, tell yourself that you have about a month to make your intentions clear. Don't wait for the perfect moment to tell her.

Part 2 of 5: flirt with a girl

Pick Up a Girl Step 7

Step 1. Prepare something to say

Start by knowing the first thing you want to say to a girl you like before you say anything. You don't have to prepare something very exciting, it should only be an invitation to talk. You could talk about the weather if you are outside, talk about something related to the party or the setting if you are inside. When you are at a party, tell her about the party or ask her how she met the organizer. Just prepare a ready-made sentence before you start the discussion.

Pick Up a Girl Step 8

Step 2. Build the conversation

If your line got you only a half-hearted response, you end up with two options: give up or take the plunge and flirt with it, hoping for a happy outcome. But, if this girl has responded to you in a friendly manner, now is the perfect time to shine your public speaking skills.

  • Chatting with someone you've just met is as hard for her as it is for you. If you make it easier for her, she will thank you. Try to offer her options for chatting on light topics, like music in the bar or the party. Be honest and watch how she responds to you. Listen to what she is telling you and ask her for more details if she gives you her opinion on a topic. If you lead the conversation, she will feel more secure and will follow up and give her opinion on what you are saying.
  • Try not to turn the conversation into an interrogation, asking questions like "What are you doing?" ", " Where do you live ? "Or" What school are you studying at? " one after the other. Instead of asking questions, turn them into affirmations, like "you look like someone from Rome" or "I would bet you are organizing events". You will sound more candid and give her space to give a more natural response, which will help her relax and enjoy the conversation.
Pick Up a Girl Step 9

Step 3. Use humor

Humor is a universal thing, and finding someone who appreciates your sense of humor will feel your best. On the other hand, if she doesn't respond to your jokes, she may not be interested in you or worth chasing after her. From that point of view, humor is great for taking the temperature and knowing if she likes you without having to be too blunt, which would make the discussion a little weird.

Even if you think most people can't appreciate or understand your overly quick, subtle, or weird sense of humor, give it free rein during the conversation. If you interest the girl you're talking to, she'll appreciate your jokes and laugh at them even when others don't find them funny

Pick Up a Girl Step 10

Step 4. Give her subtle compliments

Whatever compliment you give her, it has to come naturally. The key to a successful conversation is being able to talk about things that make both of you feel comfortable. When you find a way to compliment her or flirt with her without breaking the flow of the conversation, go for it, otherwise, keep it to yourself.

The only answers a woman can give to a too obvious compliment are: agree (in which case she looks full of herself), disagree (in which case she looks embarrassed) or return the compliment, which happens infrequently, especially at the start of a conversation. It is more important to show her that she is going to have fun staying with you rather than making her understand that you find her attractive, she will have understood it anyway, because you came to talk to her and you started to flirt with her

Pick Up a Girl Step 11

Step 5. Show him your character

Women like confident men who feel good about themselves. Never refuse to answer a question she asks about you and answer it honestly. Most women prefer a man who builds robots in his basement and is not ashamed to talk about it with a smile, than a man who would feel embarrassed and ashamed of such a hobby.

Don't be afraid to criticize her gently (by turning it into questions: say, for example, “but wouldn't that be a little silly?”) Or make nice jokes at her expense, as long as you don't. don't overdo it. Women appreciate that a man shows his interest in them without actually being in awe, because it means that there is less chance that he will attach too quickly and cause a situation that would make them uncomfortable.. On the other hand, if you don't stop making jokes the hard way, you'll just look rude and childish

Pick Up a Girl Step 12

Step 6. Ask him for his number

Once it's time to end the discussion, end on a high note by asking for her phone number. Let her know that you had a great time, but now is the time for you to go home, go back to work, or do whatever it is that you have been planning on doing the rest of the day. If you can get her number, call her while you wait a day or two and plan a weekend outing.

Pick Up a Girl Step 13

Step 7. Prepare for the first date

The best first dates are those where you won't need to have a conversation for too long. Avoid concerts or the cinema, prefer an outing that will allow you both to talk and that will not cost you too much. Think of something and prepare alternatives, most women prefer when the man makes the decision of where to meet.

  • If you have an idea of ​​a less ordinary outing that she might enjoy, such as renting a rowboat, talk to her. Otherwise, having lunch, coffee or a drink somewhere is always a good idea. All of these options will give you the opportunity for an uninterrupted conversation and (if you're lucky) a first kiss.
  • Invite her on the first date, but don't push it too hard. Some women feel insulted if the man pays every time they see each other and they will prefer to split the bill or pay their share in some other way. Whatever its decision, it must be yours too!
  • Give it some space. It's your first date, not the signing of your marriage certificate. Once you agree on the place and time, don't call her until you meet. You will have plenty of time to chat at this time.
  • If she calls you to postpone it, give her the benefit of the doubt. After all, if she hadn't wanted to go further, she could have done it much sooner. Be patient and adapt.

Part 3 of 5: flirt with a friend

Pick Up a Girl Step 14

Step 1. Realize the risks involved

This is one of the trickier situations, but remember that your friend is probably not going to stop wanting to be your friend just because you invited her out, even if she doesn't want to date you. It is quite possible that the biggest problem is with you, as you try to find the right time to invite her out. If all of your hopes and dreams are based on going out with your friend, you are in for a very big deal of disappointment.

Pick Up a Girl Step 15

Step 2. Wait until you are alone

It can save you the embarrassment of being said no in front of other friends. If your friend has at least half the respect you have for her, she isn't going to make you feel bad about it after your request. If she makes a scene for you, she probably wasn't worth it after all.

Pick Up a Girl Step 16

Step 3. Just invite her out

Don't make a declaration of love to her, just invite her out on a date. You may feel love for her, but even if you tell her, that doesn't give her a concrete reason to date you. It's best for the moment that you keep your feelings to yourself and invite her out like you would any other girl.

Make sure she clearly understands that this will be a romantic date and not a fun date. You will not help your cause by hiding or confusing your intentions

Pick Up a Girl Step 17

Step 4. Practice restraint

Whatever the outcome after you invite your friend out on a date, you will be the only one responsible and you should then behave like a mature and courteous man. If she says yes, that's great, but now is not the time to confess anything to him. After all, you haven't even dated yet.If she says no, don't blame her for your disappointment either. You should apologize (she will understand) and go home to grieve your feelings in private.

Part 4 of 5: flirt with a coworker

Pick Up a Girl Step 18

Step 1. Realize the risks involved

Unlike setting up a classroom, you're much more likely to have to work with a girl you've invited out to your workplace, whether or not she accepted your invitation. You cannot request to change workgroups while waiting for the semester to end, and neither can she. As long as you have calculated the risks it poses to your personal comfort and to hers if your plan does not go as planned, there are steps you can take to minimize those risks to ensure that you can continue to support your expenses. working days, regardless of the outcome of your request.

Pick Up a Girl Step 19

Step 2. Do not bite the hand that feeds you

There is a good reason that makes this adage everlasting. The closer you are to someone without having romantic views on them, the more drama and sadness you will expose yourself to if you try to flirt or invite that person out. In a professional context, this means that it would be better if you try to pick up a colleague with whom you don't work closely or who you don't see too often, if you can't help yourself.

If you work in a large corporation, such as a department store or business company, try to focus on girls who don't work in the same department as yours. So, no matter how things turn out, both of you will be able to come to work without causing discomfort

Pick Up a Girl Step 20

Step 3. Show your respect

Obviously, respect is an important part of any (realistic) love strategy, but when it comes to a co-worker you need to be even more aware of it. Think about it by taking her point of view: she comes to work because she needs the job, not because she saw a lot of cute boys at work when she came for the interview. Anything that could make her job more stressful will have consequences in her day-to-day life, as she cannot afford not to come to work anymore just because she had an inappropriate conversation with one of her coworkers.. Never behave in such a way that a woman will dread the moment of coming to work more than before you ask her out.

Be brief, polite, and if she says no, don't push it or bother her. Even if you feel like you're friendly, there's a good chance she's not going to want you to keep hitting her after she says no to you. Give it plenty of space

Pick Up a Girl Step 21

Step 4. Keep it low

Many employers dislike love affairs at work, as they often result in loss of productivity and breaches of company rules (from smoking breaks that last to inappropriate arguments instead. to work). If you decide to pick up a coworker, don't tell anyone about your intentions.

As long as the job continues to be done the same way it was yesterday, your bosses won't be concerned about your romantic intentions with one of your coworkers, even if you end up dating her on a regular basis. Just remember this, the primary purpose of your workplace is to work there. Everything else takes a back seat, even if it seems very interesting or important to you

Part 5 of 5: Flirt with a Girl While Traveling

Pick Up a Girl Step 22

Step 1. Realize that there is a dynamic of romance when traveling

Maybe you had to go back to your hometown for a family reunion, but you just don't mind it, so you went for a coffee and you find yourself sitting next to a pretty girl. Maybe you take yourself a bus trip across the country before you start a career and you want to see a bit of the country. You can of course flirt with a girl while you are traveling, as long as you remember not to expect too much, be direct and enjoy the moment. You will only frustrate each other if you approach her as if she lives in the same city as you.

Pick Up a Girl Step 23

Step 2. Be frank

If you have the feeling that you have to lie or not specify certain information to pick up a girl, you are wrong. You won't do yourself or her any good by lying. On top of that, many women find dating a "passing man" to be mysterious and exciting, as there is a high probability that there will be no consequences. You won't know until you make it clear to her that you are in this kind of situation.

Your trip alone is a great topic of conversation, so you won't have to think too much about it to find something to talk about. Just tell her you're visiting for a few days and ask about where you are. Most girls will be happy to give you their opinion and that way the conversation will run like clockwork

Pick Up a Girl Step 24

Step 3. Be quick

You don't have time to be shy or reserved. You want to go out with a girl, a night out with someone you just met and probably will never see again. This girl won't know that's what you want if you "spare" her all night. Rather than asking her for her number, ask her if she would like to date you now, before you leave. Ask her her opinion on where she would prefer and offer to invite her (as usual). If you want to hit on a girl for a one-night stand, the key is to show her what you want (one night of having fun together) and then have fun!

Pick Up a Girl Step 25

Step 4. Be Faithful

If you have someone at home waiting for you, don't court another girl on your travels. This is cowardly and unfair behavior that you will have on your mind for a long time after your moment of infidelity. Imagine what it would feel like if your girlfriend had a scorching weekend with a stranger who lives hundreds of miles away during her last family reunion, while you were home alone and missed her company. No decision taken on a whim, no little crush is worth jeopardizing your relationship.

  • If you've ever thought you're ready to end this relationship, do it in order and finish it first. Don't be sneaky by doing things behind your girlfriend's back. Once you are officially single, you will have a lot of opportunities to go have fun with other girls.


  • Practice: it is by forging that one becomes a blacksmith. Let go of your fear of talking to women by treating the women around you every day like the normal people that they are. Talk to them like you are talking to men until you get used to the idea that women are just like you and there is no reason to feel intimidated when you talk to them.
  • If a girl agrees to date you, you might take a look on a social media site to find what interests her. This is a great way to come up with discussion ideas for your evening together.
  • Be frank, give him compliments and ask for his phone number. Women appreciate straightforward men who take matters into their own hands.
  • Always treat her as an equal. If you constantly try to be pleasant to him, you will seem insecure. If you put her on a pedestal, she'll crush you. And of course, if you don't treat her well, she's not going to be interested in you at all.
  • Stay cool. Remember that you are both human beings at the end of the day. It's okay to be nervous, but stay dignified and show yourself as confidently as possible so that your nervousness doesn't turn into a fear.
  • Just like at a show, it's better that you do your part and wait for the audience's reaction rather than going through the skits until no one wants to cheer you on. In other words, do your best and then wait for his reaction. No one likes to deal with a bastard who doesn't understand a hint. If you've made a good impression on her, she'll let you know when she feels it's the right time.
  • Some girls have a lot of suitors. She'll notice you more easily among others if you stay persistent, positive, and act like a gentleman.


  • Avoid appearing to lack affection or self-confidence. These are not things that will help you. Girls don't look for a wounded animal to care for and heal it. They are looking for a nice and stable man to have a good time. Remember that it is not enough to want someone to give you something for that someone to give it to you. Give him good reasons to give you what you want.
  • The birth in recent years of the "seducer" has contributed to a flirtatious attitude towards women that is very misogynistic and focused on the short term. These new flirting techniques rely on a sassy tone and multiple tries until you get lucky and come across someone sensitive to this kind of argument. It is best that you avoid these kinds of techniques, they show no respect for women and are almost useless if you are trying to find and keep a long term relationship.
  • Pay attention to what your eyes are looking at. Do NOT stare at any part of her anatomy, especially while she is talking to you. Remember that looking at her while she speaks and fixing her face are two different things. Avoid staring at her.

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