We have all heard of the famous "friendly zone". Many people also felt an unrequited attraction for a friend. There is also a lot of debate around the possibility of matching friendship and romantic love. Trying to seduce a friend is completely different than trying to seduce a stranger, and the success of your business will largely depend on the strength of your friendship. Seducing a friend can seem riskier in this sense, as you can lose your friendship if your attempt fails. However, if you think your feelings are mixed, you can open up and have a great relationship (by doing it right).
Part 1 of 4: sowing the seeds
Step 1. Make sure you are great friends
This is essential before moving on. This step should be considered as separable from the only phase of preparation for seduction. If you are friends with this person, they will interpret your attempt at seduction from what they already know about you, more than the seduction itself. All friendships are unique, but they do share some common traits.
- Make a habit of talking to her regularly. Even if these are just trivial discussions, he will understand that you are interested in him as a person, as well as in the little things of his daily life.
- Help him to have confidence in him. We usually choose to surround ourselves with people we trust. This applies as well in friendship as in love.
Step 2. Make sure your timing is right
Only make your advances if you think the time is right. If your friend has just heard bad news and is looking for a shoulder to cry on, trying to seduce them won't be a good idea. This also applies if your chemistry isn't as strong at some point. If you don't think the time is right, wait before making any advances.
However, avoid waiting too long. You risk that another person declares himself to your friend and thus ruin your chances of seducing him
Step 3. Spend a lot of time together
Generally speaking, the more time two people of the opposite sex spend together, the more an attraction can develop between them. Before starting a direct approach, it is sometimes easier to ask him to spend more time with him. If you don't see each other regularly, you should offer to spend time with you. Even if you hang out in a friendly manner, you will maximize your chances of dating.
You can see yourself with other people, but the chances are less that you will develop an attraction between you. By staying alone, you can focus on each other and get to know each other better
Part 2 of 4: seduce a friend
Step 1. Pick a time when the two of you are just the two of you
You cannot seduce your friend in a crowded place. To bond closely, you need to be in an intimate place. You can enjoy the end of an evening, or invite your friend to hang out at your place (and vice versa). A quiet and private place is important so that you don't come under external pressure, affecting the way your friend reacts to your attempt to seduce. Even if he is sensitive to your advances, he may be shy or put off by the idea of other people witnessing this scene.
Step 2. Create a relaxed and pleasant atmosphere
Even if your friend is physically attracted to you, you will not be able to seduce them by demoralizing them. Showcase your positive personality. You can do this very simply by doing everything you can to be pleasant, when you are in the presence of the person you want to seduce. By being nicer, you will create opportunities for yourself to seduce your friend more openly, whether you are doing it consciously or not. Seduction is rarely something you do seriously.
Step 3. Express your attraction through your actions
Touch is an integral part of flirting. This is how you can move beyond your simple friendship and maybe start a romantic relationship. For example, you can hug her or touch her arm briefly. You don't risk much by doing these gestures, and you'll quickly see from his reaction if you can be more enterprising.
Your attempts at seduction must be subtle if you want to be able to back down, in the event that your attraction is not mutual
Step 4. Support his gaze
While it's okay to maintain eye contact with a friend when chatting, prolonging that contact is usually a sign that your feelings are more than just friendship. Studies have shown that holding a person's gaze for a while can create romantic feelings. Even if you spend a lot of time with this person, hold their gaze when you seek to seduce them.
His reaction can be positive or negative. She depends a lot on the physical attraction she feels for you
Step 5. Flirt as part of your chats
If the friend you want to seduce is already close to you and comfortable in your company, it will naturally be easy for you to communicate with each other. With these solid foundations, you can begin to subtly flirt with him. Exchange jokes as part of your conversations to get started. Compliments are a more direct approach to showing your interest in him, especially if you are targeting his physical attractions.
For example, you can say, “I love your new haircut. It looks great on you”
Step 6. Assess your friend's immediate reaction
After you have tried to seduce your friend, it is very important that you take note of how they react to your advances. If he smiles when you touch him or responds to your jokes by teasing you back, chances are he's trying to get you to come forward. Otherwise, if your friend seems uncomfortable, take it as a signal that you need to stop your attempt at seduction.
We all have a different psychology. If you are already friends with this person, you must have a good idea of how he would react to the advances of a girl who attracts him
Step 7. Be bold
All seduction strategies are based on a moment of truth. Usually it is an overtly sexual or romantic kiss or comment. If your friend reacted well to your first attempts, you can take it to the next level. Kiss him on the lips because it is a sign that you consider him more than just a friend. Be more daring when you think the timing is right. Don't be too quick, either. Even if you are stressed, this is not an experience you want to rush.
Being bold is inherently risky. It is therefore recommended to assess your chances of success before committing to openly seducing your friend
Step 8. Consider the possibility of being rejected
One of the paradoxes of seduction is that it is sometimes difficult to know who is seducing whom. Women tend to take a more passive stance when it comes to dating, but it's also possible that they're the ones to take the first step. If you feel a mutual attraction between you, it is also possible that he is waiting for the right moment to come out. Make him understand that his advances will be well received.
Part 3 of 4: Preserving Your Friendship
Step 1. Accept the consequences
The consequences of your advances can be very positive, or on the contrary negative. Your friendship can thus give birth to an overnight relationship, or more serious. On the other hand, you can also quickly feel embarrassed or uncomfortable. In this case, the best way to restore your friendship (if that's what you want) is to talk openly about what just happened. Express what you felt and what motivated your desire to seduce him.
- It's best not to start by asking him why he rejected you. Focusing only on his refusal risks creating resentment on both sides.
- If it is impossible to save your friendship, you must accept that you have lost everything. You won't always come out victorious in your attempts, whether you like it or not. This is true in your professional life as well as in your sentimental life.
Step 2. Be open to dialogue
If your attempt failed for one reason or another, you might both be embarrassed. It's best to take the opportunity to talk about your feelings openly. This can lessen the impact of her rejection and is absolutely necessary if you want to preserve your friendship. Be honest. If your friend is trying to joke around the situation, it's best if you do the same and leave this episode behind as quickly as possible. If not, talk about what just happened as two friends. Reassure him that you want to remain friends, despite the fact that your attraction is not mutual.
You can start a conversation by saying, “I know what you can think. I am drawn to you, but our friendship is very important to me. I hope you don't think my feelings for you changed after this. "
Step 3. Project yourself
After you seduce your friend, you need to take the next step whether or not your attempt worked, whether you are still friends, or your friendship is over. Results may vary, but in the worst case scenario, you will not benefit from suffering from your situation. An important part of your life is accepting your choices and learning from your mistakes. Even if you regret showing your feelings, you need to forgive yourself as quickly as possible. After all, you took a risk, and that's something to be proud of.
- If your attempt fails completely and ends your friendship, change your mind. Keep busy as much as possible, as this will allow you to recover from this failure faster. Don't take his rejection personally. Go ahead and turn your frustration into a driver for a new stage in your life.
- If your attempt at dating fails, but you remain friends, try to pick up where you left off. It will be easier for you to maintain your friendship if you talk about what just happened. Accept that your romantic feelings are not mutual, but that your friend values your friendship.
- If you remain friends despite the fact that he rejected you, he will certainly see how important he is to you. If you let things take their course, he may realize the mistake he made and decide to date you.
Part 4 of 4: Evaluate Your Options
Step 1. Consider your chances of success
If you are already friends, you may be able to gauge your chances of success based on your interactions. Are you already flirting? Is your friend dating someone else? Do you think he finds you attractive? If you get a negative answer to any of these questions, it doesn't necessarily mean that there is no hope for you. You're just going to have to play your cards more finely, and maybe change some of your character traits depending on what he's looking for in a partner.
Assessing your situation before making any advances will allow you to put the odds in your favor. Even if your attempt is successful, things can quickly turn in the wrong direction if you don't know where you want to go
Step 2. Recognize if your friend wants to be seduced
Seduction is a positive expression of the attention we pay to a person, and it is rare not to appreciate the attraction that we can provoke in another. It is another thing that he responds positively to your advances, but you should keep in mind that your friend may have feelings for you and you may not have noticed them. If your advances are not embarrassing or desperate, your approach will seem above all affectionate.
Step 3. Evaluate whether your attempt is worth it or not
Unlike wishing to date a complete stranger, you risk more when trying to seduce a friend. For starters, you can jeopardize your friendship. Even worse, you can also affect your relationship with the friends you have in common. On the other hand, your friendship can be strong enough to survive your failed advances, if you manage to talk about it openly together.
- Compare your expectations to your chances of success and decide if your approach is worth it.
- There is no easy answer to such a question, but it is important that you can live with the decision you are about to make. While seducing him may seem like the riskiest option, you may suffer even more from not declaring yourself if you genuinely love this person.
Step 4. Identify your expectations
Your chances of success will vary greatly depending on the expectations you have. If you want to have a serious relationship, but only get a one-night stand, then it's not certain that your attempt is worth it. It is also not recommended to seek out a one-night stand with someone who is likely to become attached to you.
Step 5. Identify what you want from your friend
Your attempt at seduction can have several degrees. You may wish to build a long-term relationship with him, or like him to become your "friend and more if affinity."
If you don't want to have a serious relationship with him, be very clear about your intentions. Pursue such a goal if your friend has already expressed that he is open and comfortable with this type of sexuality
- Don't forget to do some soul-searching. If you think you can make him seem more desirable, this will allow you to maximize the chances that your attempt will be successful.
- Changing the way he or she sees you can make all the difference. Just cutting your hair can change the way a longtime friend sees you.
- Don't try to seduce your friend if they are already dating someone else. Your attempt at seduction may fail, and your friendship may seriously suffer. It is also morally incorrect.
- Don't just be friends with that person, hoping you might be able to date them someday. Your friendship will then seem false to him, and the chances that it will turn into a romantic relationship will be even lower.