How to attract a woman: 9 steps (with pictures)

How to attract a woman: 9 steps (with pictures)
How to attract a woman: 9 steps (with pictures)

How would you like to make a strong impression on women just by talking to them? Did you know that after you catch a woman's attention your interesting personality will take over? This article explains how to talk to a woman, in order to attract a crowd!


Part 1 of 2: setting the stage

Attract a Woman Step 1

Step 1. Get the gist of the conversation at the very beginning

This, of course, depends on the woman and the situation. But you want to avoid doing what most men do: put the burden of conversation on the woman's shoulders with redundant questions and a search for commonalities. Aim to do about 75% of the conversation, maybe a little less. Your aim here is to demonstrate your fantastic personality and your great worth. Try to keep the conversation light, upbeat, and fun. But what topics could you use to start this conversation? There are plenty of them.

  • The cheeky, mischievous alpha male.

    • “I know you've probably been told this often, but you are absolutely the most gorgeous woman I have seen… in the past three minutes. "
    • "My friend must have dragged me out tonight, but I'm glad he did, because seeing you here and now was worth it. "
  • The slightly shy man.

    • “I'm sorry for being clumsy, but I get really shy around pretty girls. "
    • “I'm glad you're still here. I tried to find the courage to come and talk to you for half an hour and was worried that I would embarrass myself in front of you by being totally sober. "
  • The straight man.

    • "Hello, my name is [name], what brings you here tonight? "
    • "This is the moment I introduce myself, where you smile and let me buy you a drink, right? "
    • "I was trying to think of an excuse to talk to you, but I couldn't find anything. Can I just tell you an interesting story that happened to me the other day? "
Attract a Woman Step 2

Step 2. Avoid mundane topics like work, politics, or anything negative

Be in control of the conversation, but without being directive. Don't fall for interview-type questions like "Where are you from? Or "What are you doing here?""

  • If she brings up topics that you think might steer the conversation in the wrong direction, gently push the other direction. Say something relevant to the topic, but light, fun, and might lead to another topic.
  • If she keeps coming back to topics that you think are leading the conversation astray, then you have two options.

    • Try to take advantage of this topic, as she seems to want to talk about it.
    • Find an elegant and respectful way to leave the conversation and focus on someone else instead. A simple "It was nice to talk to you" should do the trick.
Attract a Woman Step 3

Step 3. Overcome obstacles with grace

Many women will say they have a boyfriend if they aren't attracted to you enough yet. At the same time, many women who say they have a boyfriend actually do, so you hit a roadblock. However, do not worry, because an obstacle is meant to be overcome. You will pass it safely.

  • If a woman says "I have a boyfriend, I'd rather you didn't talk to me," smile, tell her it was nice to meet her, and move on to another candidate. Sometimes life has unpleasant surprises in store for us.
  • If a woman says "I have a boyfriend" and stops there, you can say, "Alright. But do you see a downside to our continuing to chat? If she answers no, keep working. A bad surprise at the start could eventually turn into a good one!
  • Don't assume that you will be able to convince a woman in a relationship or married to give you her number. Maybe you don't even want to be that man. If a woman mentions her boyfriend, you probably want to start looking elsewhere, unless you are dying to get that particular woman's number.
Attract a Woman Step 4

Step 4. Don't worry about the outcome

Prepare yourself not to worry about getting a woman's attention or not. If she's attracted to you, that's a bonus. If not, you'll move on to another interesting girl.

If you need her to be attracted to you because your ego can't stand rejection, you will be hurt time and time again, because you will be rejected at times. Rejection is a natural thing. If you are too upset or disappointed that you missed a single opportunity, you will miss the thousands of other opportunities that lie ahead

Part 2 of 2: Closing the deal

Attract a Woman Step 5

Step 1. Don't be in need

If the woman thinks for even a moment that she is worth more to you than you do to hers, you are putting yourself in a weak position. Why ? Because people need to work a bit for their reward, because it makes it even tastier.

  • There are many techniques you can use to show that you are not in need. But for now, the best thing you can do is detach yourself from the result (see above). Remember: while this woman may be beautiful, funny, and smart, she is just one of many beautiful, funny, and smart women in your world. If it doesn't work with her, it will eventually work with another woman.
  • Don't drink it with compliments. One to start the conversation is all the woman needs to let her know she interests you. In fact, because women are smart, they usually know you care about them without even a compliment. So keep your sentimental compliments in reserve and focus on impressing him with your wit, humor, and outlook.
Attract a Woman Step 6

Step 2. Set up what is called "reverse cold reading"

How does it work? Find something about it that you are pretty sure is wrong. Then say you don't like that element in a girl. Because that's not true about her, then she'll explain to you that she isn't like that. It's called qualifying and we practice it when we're trying to win someone's favor. With reverse cold reading, you "bait" her qualification: subconsciously, she should be more attracted to you, because you seemingly share similarities, or at least similar perspectives.

Attract a Woman Step 7

Step 3. Stay relaxed and detached

Your number one priority should be having fun: talking to a beautiful and interesting woman is incredibly exhilarating. Flirt, tease, be slightly arrogant if that's your character, and use sarcasm (with a wry smile so she knows you're kidding). Just pretend you're talking to an old friend.

  • If she says something you don't agree with, tell her. In other words, don't be a soft rump without being mean or aggressive. Just explain your opinion and calmly state how you feel: a good way to keep the conversation going and have an interesting topic to discuss. If you're confident, you can tease her by telling her that she's really not cool not to agree with you (always with a wry smile on your face, of course).
  • Stay calm. Very, very calm. Like the captain of a ship, you know exactly where you want to go and everything you are doing and saying to a goal. Nothing can stop you, even rejection. You expect the best, but are prepared for the worst. Why ? Because you are a calm Olympian!
Attract a Woman Step 8

Step 4. Remember, a big part of dating girls is about time management

Why waste your time with a conversation that doesn't get you closer to your goal? In addition, distractions could arise and steal his attention, so every second counts. Besides, with a little practice, it's easy to get numbers in just a few seconds.

You may find it difficult to speak even for a few minutes before asking for a number, dance, or whatever. This is because it is complicated to keep a lively, direct and spiritual conversation for a long time, even when you are at full blast. Therefore, don't lengthen the conversation without an end goal in mind

Attract a Woman Step 9

Step 5. Finally, constantly assess their attraction to you

Observe if her body language is open, if her pupils are dilated, if she is sneering or if she is touching you. Regardless of their personality or culture, women tend to show the same signs of attraction. With a little practice, you will be able to spot these signs very quickly. Just follow your intuition, which is usually good. And thanks for reading!


  • Never force a woman to do anything she doesn't want to. Such an attitude would put her off immediately.
  • Keep training! Try talking to a random woman on the street once a day. Remember that having the right body language and the right tone will determine your power of attraction!
  • Be confident, but not sufficient.

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