How to Refuse a Kiss: 12 Steps (with Pictures)

How to Refuse a Kiss: 12 Steps (with Pictures)
How to Refuse a Kiss: 12 Steps (with Pictures)

Someone wants to kiss you, but you don't want to. It could be someone you just met or a friend you don't want to be very intimate with. Your boyfriend might want to kiss you, but you're not ready. This is not a big deal! Be firm and don't kiss anyone unless you really want to. You can avoid the kiss, explain yourself, or say no simply.


Part 1 of 3: Refuse a kiss

Refuse a Kiss Step 1

Step 1. Be firm

You don't have to kiss someone if you don't want to. Don't be afraid to say no !

Be kind and respectful, but be careful not to let anyone take advantage of you. Be your own lawyer. Kiss only the people you really want to kiss.

Refuse a Kiss Step 2

Step 2. Gently push the person away

You shouldn't violently push away someone who just wants to kiss you. Try to put yourself in his shoes. Imagine all the courage it takes to ask someone for a kiss! Find a way to respectfully and gently decline.

  • Try saying, “I'm not in love with you, I'm sorry. "
  • Say, “I really like our friendship, but I'm not ready to take it up a notch. "
  • Say, "thank you, but no" or "I'm really flattered, but I'm not interested." "
Refuse a Kiss Step 3

Step 3. Shake your head to say no

If you are dating your boyfriend and he decides to kiss you, don't push him away in a way that scares him. Just shake your head. He might feel rejected if you push him away. It may be good to just look in a different direction or to take your attention away from the person for a few seconds.

So that he doesn't feel rejected, you can give him a smile after you refuse. He's very likely to think that you don't like him at all if you don't smile. If you like her, but you still don't feel like kissing her yet, then you need to explain to her why

Part 2 of 3: Avoid a kiss

Refuse a Kiss Step 4

Step 1. Watch your behavior

Avoid behaving in a provocative or flirtatious manner. If you don't want someone trying to kiss you, be very careful about the way you behave around them. More often than not, a person will be more inclined to kiss you if they think you want to, too.

You might like this person, but you're not ready to kiss them just yet. You will need to be clear about your expectations. If the person is trying to kiss you, try to decline gently and make it clear to them why you don't want them to kiss you

Refuse a Kiss Step 5

Step 2. Avoid being alone

A person is much more likely to kiss you if you are alone with them and share a moment of intimacy. Invite friends you have in common to hang out with you or make sure you bring a friend with you at all times. Spend time in public places with the person who would like to kiss you. Choose places where she is unlikely to try to kiss you.

Refuse a Kiss Step 6

Step 3. Take his attention away

Talk about a topic that has nothing to do with kissing. Something so different that it will be very difficult for her to think of wanting to kiss you. Suggest an activity that is very unlikely to result in a kiss.

  • If you refuse a partner's kiss, hold their hand or rest your head on their shoulder. Show him that it is possible for you to make physical contact and enjoy it without having to kiss each other.
  • Remember to have a pacifier in your mouth every time you are with him. He won't be able to kiss you when he sees the treat in your mouth.
Refuse a Kiss Step 7

Step 4. Give your boyfriend a cheek

If someone is trying to kiss you, make sure your lips are out of reach by tilting your head slightly to the side. Remember to make it clear that you'd rather kiss you on the cheek than on the lips. He should understand the hint.

Refuse a Kiss Step 8

Step 5. Give an excuse

Say you're recovering from a viral infection or have a cold. Tell her that you have a cold sore on your mouth and that you don't want to kiss anyone or else you could pass the herpes virus on to her. Tell him you have severe halitosis.

The problem with this approach is that it is simply a delaying tactic. If you don't want to kiss her at all or if you don't want to kiss her for quite a while, then you can choose this tactic

Part 3 of 3: justify yourself

Refuse a Kiss Step 9

Step 1. Explain your refusal

Tell her very explicitly why you don't want the kiss. You don't have to give any explanation, but it might help you get rid of the person. Be honest and frank. If you're not in the mood, just say so. If you don't like the person, then be honest about it.

  • You have every right to refuse a kiss. Don't allow the person to convince you to kiss them even though you have doubts.
  • Do not try to explain yourself at length. Say precisely what you need to say to get the point across.
Refuse a Kiss Step 10

Step 2. Speak up

Tell her you're not ready for a kiss yet. If he really cares about you, he should respect your will and be patient until you are ready. Don't allow someone to pressure you to kiss you. It will be so much better when you are ready to do it.

Refuse a Kiss Step 11

Step 3. Say you don't want a kiss

State in advance and clearly to the person that you don't like to kiss, so they won't try to kiss. If he tries anyway, ask yourself if this is really the person you want to be with.

Refuse a Kiss Step 12

Step 4. Change the subject or go

Sometimes people tend to insist on kissing you even after you've made it clear that you don't want to. Try to change the subject. If that doesn't work, find an excuse to leave as soon as possible. Don't wait if someone makes you uncomfortable! The only way to put an end to such situations may be to leave the person.


  • Say you are not in the mood. This could help you avoid making the person who wants to kiss you feel very rejected.
  • If you were already kissing and want to stop when your partner wants to continue, just pull out. If he tries to continue, then turn your head and say no.
  • If you notice that he is getting ready to kiss you, you can turn the kiss into a hug. Turn your head slightly and hug it. Then smile and go.
  • Sometimes a person can hold your face in their hands to kiss you. It may sound romantic. But don't let that go if you don't want to. It is better to say simply no thanks or shake your head rather than pull back violently.
  • Look him in the eye for about 3 seconds after stepping back. He should understand the hint and stop.
  • If despite the fact that you took a step back, he still tries to hug you, take a step back and explain yourself. Defend yourself. If the person is still trying to kiss you, ask a friend for help or leave as soon as possible.
  • Pretend to make a call and walk away from him.


  • Don't push him away, unless he's trying to force you. A person who behaves like this can turn out to be somewhat imposing or violent in a relationship. Pay attention.
  • Don't chew gum thinking you won't be able to kiss you. The person could either kiss you despite having the gum in your mouth or ask you to spit it out.

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