Loneliness is one of the most difficult feelings to overcome. Those of us who suffer from loneliness know how emotionally draining it is and how this feeling can lead to depression. In fact, the most frustrating part of being alone is that sometimes we feel alone and disconnected, even when we are surrounded by people. Fortunately, there are several strategies that can help us overcome loneliness. Don't give up, people love you. By making the necessary efforts, you will be able to overcome your loneliness.
Part 1 of 3: coping with loneliness
Step 1. Realize that being alone and being alone are two entirely different things
Feeling lonely is a feeling that does not depend on our environment or our social activities of the moment. While someone can feel lonely in the middle of a crowd, another person can be perfectly lonely and not feel lonely at all.
- To feel alone is to feel deep within you that you are cut off from the world.
- Being alone is when no one is by your side.
- You might be surrounded by a lot of people and still feel lonely.
Step 2. Try to understand your loneliness better
Think about what you like, what you don't like, and what environments you're comfortable with. You might feel lonely in some crowds and feel a deep connection in smaller groups. The only way to move forward will be to figure out exactly what situations you are comfortable with. Think about situations in which you are particularly uncomfortable and feel lonely.
- Do you like spending time with your friends in a small group?
- How do you feel in bars, nightclubs or events where you find yourself in the middle of the public?
- Are you comfortable in large gatherings where you know everyone?
Step 3. Examine your past
Perhaps you have had painful experiences in the past that have contributed to your feeling of loneliness. Start by determining if this is the case for you. If so, you will better understand how you are feeling and be able to move on.
- Perhaps you have been abused or neglected by the people who were supposed to take care of you.
- Perhaps you have been harassed or neglected by your classmates.
- Maybe you feel out of place because of a physical or mental disability, your gender, your background.
Step 4. Seek professional help
See a mental health professional and talk to them about your feelings. A psychiatrist, counselor, social worker or psychologist can help you analyze your past and determine where your unease and loneliness is coming from. This might be one of the last things you want to crave, but if loneliness is taking an emotional toll on you and ruining your life, consider getting professional help.
Through therapy, you will learn new tools, skills, and strategies to help you get better. A therapist can give you the support you need so badly
Step 5. Be true to yourself
Don't let the urge to conform to other people's expectations make you a different person. Focus on yourself rather than on external influences. Be proud of who you are and more people will want to connect with you.
- Tell yourself that your own opinions are important.
- Constantly reinforce your originality and your personality.
- Don't try to be like everyone else at all costs just to be accepted more.
Part 2 of 3: interacting with others
Step 1. Open up to your close friends or family
Pick a very good friend or family member that you are very close to and talk to them about your problem. You will find that the people you care about will go out of their way to make you feel better and less lonely. After all, being in good company is one of the most obvious ways to feel less alone.
- Your friend or loved one will know how you are feeling and thus be more understanding when you go through a situation where you feel lonely.
- This person could also give you advice or their perspective on your feelings.
- He might go out of his way to make you feel loved and surrounded.
Step 2. Meet other people like you
One of the reasons you might feel lonely in the middle of a crowd is that you are then probably surrounded by extroverted people who are much more social than you or who share quite different ideas or interests. of yours. To overcome this situation, meet people who you will feel closer to and with whom you can share more things.
- Talk briefly to different people, so you can meet like-minded people.
- Learn how to conduct quick interviews. Try asking people where they grew up, where they live, where they were educated, or what they do for a living. These are easy ways to meet people you have things in common with.
- Don't get locked into the idea that there is no one who is unlike you.
Step 3. Listen to others
Sometimes our loneliness is heightened by the fact that we feel too stressed or too shy to talk and distract people. So prefer to listen to others talk. Outgoing and outgoing people usually like to talk about themselves - see an opportunity. These people will appreciate that you listen to them and you will fit in with the group by being the person who knows how to listen.
Step 4. Master the art of conversation
Practice having conversations with different people and getting used to socializing. This way, when you are in a large group, you will be more comfortable and be able to bond better.
- Talk to other people about things you have in common, such as the area where you grew up, the university where you studied, or your mutual friends.
- Tell people about current events, be it weather, sports or recent events in your community.
- Avoid focusing the conversation on your own interests at the expense of those of others.
Step 5. Force yourself to socialize
The reason you feel lonely in a group might be because you are not used to socializing in large groups. To overcome this, force yourself to talk to people. With practice, you will achieve this. The more you socialize, the easier it will become and the more comfortable you will be talking to others and making new friends.
- Focus on having deep conversations, instead of saying small talk. If appropriate, ask people what they think about a topic that interests you.
- Socialize with people you know and love.
- Start in environments where you are comfortable.
Part 3 of 3: Changing the way you socialize
Step 1. Realize that it's the quality of friends that matters, not the quantity
Realize that just because you have a lot of friends or are in the middle of a crowd, these people will not cure you of your loneliness. When you are in a large group, take the opportunity to meet different people and identify people with whom you can truly bond.
Step 2. Avoid people who make you feel bad about yourself
We sometimes feel alone or excluded from a group because of the people around us. These people, whom we sometimes perceive as friends, are mean to us, make fun of us, or do not support us. Don't hang out with those kinds of people. Leave this group and find other people (groups or individuals) who will appreciate you for who you are, who will be positive, and who will support you.
Step 3. Surround yourself with friends
Identifying good friends and enjoying their company in a group or at a party will make you not feel alone when you are around people. Your friends will support you and help you feel like you belong in the group and they will also help you meet other people.
Step 4. As you seek to meet new friends, be persistent
If you are unable to bond with a person or group, continue your quest. Do not abandon. There are lots of different people. You may not be able to find your place in one group and be totally in tune with another.
Step 5. Accept that we are all different
Sometimes you won't be able to meet people who are like you. Instead of isolating yourself, try to see it as a good thing and meet people who are very different from yourself.
- It could help you grow as a person.
- You might find that you have a lot in common with people who you thought were very different from you.
- You will come to appreciate the diversity and different perspectives of people.
Step 6. Elevate yourself above the labels, such as "shy" or "special", that have been put on you
Being shy or special is no reason to feel isolated. By accepting these labels and making an excuse for your loneliness, the chances are that nothing will change. Studies have shown that people generally avoid approaching people who appear shy or self-effacing.
- Try to see yourself as a sociable person.
- Know that you can overcome your shyness.
- Realize that you are not alone.
- Getting closer to other people doesn't mean moving away from who you are. If you are alone at some gathering and are quite comfortable sitting there quietly enjoying your drink, look no further.
- Try not to overthink everything.
- Live in the moment, enjoy the little moments of silence. Loneliness is sometimes a good thing and silence is not so bad.