People who are closed-minded often resist change and new ideas. They often think that they are right and that others are wrong. They can be difficult to deal with in relationships, work situations, and other cases. This is why it is important to be able to identify them quickly in order to avoid potentially toxic relationships. The behavior and beliefs of such a person can reveal this narrow-mindedness. In case you need to interact with such a narrow-minded person, learn to assert yourself. It may also be helpful to learn more about what can cause someone to engage in such behavior.
Part 1 of 4: assess the person's behavior
Step 1. Notice how closed she seems to change
Those who are narrow-minded try to stay on the same path and often resist innovative and new methods.
- They may question the changes or dislike what goes against their worldview. For example, a narrow-minded friend might not want to know about new restaurants in town. If it's a colleague, he can resist changes in company policy.
- While many people don't cope well with change, closed-minded people may see it as negative in itself. They may not even see any distinction between change and negative.
Step 2. Notice how she talks about others
A person who is narrow-minded often has strong opinions about others. In addition, she has a tendency to judge others quickly and to make negative comments very often.
- She can judge others quickly and absolutely, without demonstrating the ability to recognize all the complexity present in human behavior.
- Suppose a friend of yours is struggling to lose weight. If he's not there, a narrow-minded person might say, “I don't think Roland can lose weight because he has little willpower. This may be due to her inability to recognize that losing weight is a complex process and she is content to pass judgment.
- She often expects the worst from others. She can say, “I feel like Margot was late for the movies last week just to punish me for not attending the Saturday shows. Instead of accepting that it is possible to be late once in a while, she will assume that there is malicious intent behind the delay.
Step 3. Observe his way of dealing with conflict
In general, closed-minded people are often eager to take sides and expect the same from those around them. In most cases, they are likely to intensify conflicts.
- Suppose two co-workers had an argument at work. Those who are narrow-minded can quickly get angry. He may come to you later and speak negatively about the other person.
- A person who is very narrow-minded is also unable to recognize the differences. She can be incredulous if you don't stand up for her in a conflict. Even if you don't have all the details of the conflict, she might say this, “But you know what John did was wrong, don't you? How can you not understand that it's wrong? "
Step 4. Evaluate if she is interested in others
People who are empathetic and curious show a genuine interest in those around them. The more curious can judge less because they become familiar with several points of view. On the other hand, a narrow-minded person may not have the same curiosity.
- Additionally, she may not be interested in the opinions of others and be convinced that she understands the situation and may even ridicule the opinions of those around her.
- For example, she may not ask you how your day was. If you are trying to talk about politics, chances are she will just talk, rather than asking you why you have such and such an opinion.
Part 2 of 4: Consider Your Beliefs
Step 1. Evaluate his moral code
Narrow-mindedness usually comes with a very strict moral code. Stubborn people often have a hard time thinking about the differences and tend to see their own journey as the best.
- They can judge someone's actions and criticize him at the same time. For example, they may not consider a given action to be morally wrong, but rather that the one who committed it is morally corrupt.
- To identify their moral code, observe how they judge others. They can be quick to condemn unusual behavior. Suppose you have a friend in an open relationship. A narrow-minded person may have a tendency to say something like “this will never work” or “it's just recklessness and a lack of responsibility. "
Step 2. See if she's okay with being wrong
Obsessive people believe that their way of seeing the world is the only one. They may not be ready to admit that their opinions, ideas or ways of acting may be wrong.
- They will stay true to their own way of seeing life, even when faced with facts that contradict them. They can even become hostile if their beliefs are questioned. For example, if the person confuses the name of an actor in one movie with another and you correct them, they will insist on being right, even after presenting them with evidence to prove otherwise.
- It can sometimes be difficult to talk to such a person because they can expect others to listen to them and always agree with them.
- In personal relationships, she may be too self-centered, constantly making unnecessary comments or giving people advice. For example, if you express your frustration about your difficulty losing weight, she might immediately say, “I think losing weight is just about willpower. "
Step 3. Notice any tendency to be stubborn
A narrow-minded person finds it difficult to change, even when it is very necessary to do so. She may be reluctant to ideas or facts that challenge her beliefs.
- For example, she might dismiss the facts. It can insist on the validity of discredited scientific research and be hostile or condescending towards those who dare to challenge it.
- She may value power struggles more than healthy conflict resolution. You may even feel like you are being forced into a debate when you meet her.
Step 4. Find out if it is hostile
Narrow-minded people tend to get angry easily, in addition to being hostile to criticism from others. They may yell, have temper tantrums, and refuse to work with people who criticize them. For example, if you have a disagreement with such a colleague, he may get upset and abandon the project. For such people, it is easier to get carried away by anger than to admit that they might be wrong.
Part 3 of 4: dealing with someone who is not open-minded
Step 1. Be firm when necessary
It is very important, both in personal and professional life. Living or working with such a person can be stressful, and knowing how to assert yourself in order to avoid abusing your goodwill is crucial.
- Respect it, but defend your position. Don't blame or humiliate her, but reaffirm your own rights and feelings. For example, if your girlfriend is narrow-minded and she constantly insists that you are selfish because you want to go out with your friends late, avoid saying, "This is ridiculous and you are trying to control everything.". Nothing prevents me from spending the night with my friends. "
- Make sure she listens to your needs and expresses them productively. For example, you can say, “I understand that you get frustrated when I go out and stay out late and I know you want us to spend more time together. But please don't judge my character by my actions. My relationship with others is also important and I have to make sure to take care of it. "
Step 2. Learn how to care for a narrow-minded loved one
You should correct inappropriate behavior if you are close to someone who behaves in this way. Do it with respect so as not to make the situation worse. It is important that you teach him to behave better with others. Address the situation immediately, but wait for your loved one to show their critical side before giving your opinion.
- Suppose you have some trouble at work, and your boyfriend, who works in another industry, starts listing all your flaws.
- Stop it immediately and say something like this, “I appreciate your opinion, but I'm not looking for advice. Can you listen to me for a moment, please? "
Step 3. Learn to relate to a close-minded colleague
This can be a frustrating situation, so it's important to try and correct your behavior right away. If he offends you, be sure to tell him.
- Suppose, for example, that a new policy has been put in place in your company regarding working hours. You try to respect her, which you find easier, but your narrow-minded colleague complains. He insists that you take his side in this matter and help him confront the boss.
- Say something like this, “Listen, I like the new system. Thanks for sharing your opinion, but I have no interest in creating a dispute about it. "
Step 4. Present the facts
This is usually a way of stopping the stubbornness of these people in the middle of a conversation. If someone insists that their way of thinking or acting is correct, present facts that prove otherwise.
- For example, a coworker may insist on taking a particular route during the trip, claiming it is the fastest. In this case, search for the route on your mobile phone's GPS.
- Be polite. Say something like, “Actually, I think that's the quickest path. The distance to be covered is less and the time indicated by the GPS is also shorter. "
Step 5. Take a break every now and then
It can be difficult to live with someone who is closed-minded. Therefore, it is quite normal for you to feel like you are taking your distance for a while. If she approaches you, step away from the situation.
- End the conversation politely. You don't need to make an already hostile person even more aggressive. Say something like “OK, thanks for the conversation” and find an excuse to leave. For example, “I have to finish a job. "
- Do something pleasant that will help you take yourself away from the situation. Read a book, watch a movie, or go for a walk. Choose a relaxing activity to take your mind off the frustrations.
Part 4 of 4: understand why someone is narrow-minded
Step 1. Be prepared to think about the reasons for this behavior
Saying that someone is narrow-minded may indicate that they are resistant to change because they find it difficult. In addition, any change in her routine could cause anxiety. To avoid being so narrow-minded, it's important to try to examine the reasons why someone might behave narrowly. These include:
- life situations;
- negative experiences in the past;
- psychological problems;
- problems with low self-esteem;
- other factors that go beyond what you know about the person.
Step 2. Realize that the person may have psychological problems
If someone behaves this way, it may be due to something out of their control such as a mental illness. Rigidity, a characteristic associated with narrow-mindedness, is a symptom of some mental disorders.
- For example, certain personality disorders can cause a person to behave in a narrow and restrictive manner.
- People who suffer from social phobia may seem reluctant to attend parties and other similar events. However, they may just want to avoid these activities because of their anxiety.
Step 3. Think about why someone is resistant to change
Some people may be afraid of change because of past situations, such as losing a job or having a painful break-up. These negative experiences with change can lead a person to adopt obtuse behaviors.