We've all experienced it once. You're standing there at a party, listening to a guy tell you at length about his collection of exotic beetles, or listening to your coworker tell you about his boyish hairstyle for the 80th time. You desperately want to get out of this situation, without being rude or offending anyone. So learn here how to run away from a boring conversation without sounding like a jerk.
Part 1 of 3: Bring others into the discussion
Step 1. Introduce the person to someone
This is a quick and easy way to escape a boring conversation. This technique works wonderfully whether you are at a party or a networking event. You just have to look around for someone to introduce into the conversation, then ask the person if they've met them before and make the introductions quickly. Ideally, they would have a reason to meet, such as a common interest or a business opportunity. You can stay a while, while the strangers make their presentation, and then ask to leave. For example, you could say the following sentences.
- Hi, have you ever met Chris? In fact, he is also part of the a capella club. This world is small, isn't it?
- Have you met Roland Dupond already? He is the director of the region's insurance company.
Step 2. Get help from a friend
While this is not the most mature attitude in the world, you can be overcome with despair to the point of catching the eye of a friend (or a friend) and sending them a Help signal! Your friend needs to understand that this is a social emergency and come to your aid. If the two of you have fallen victim to this situation very often, then you should have a signal like: pulling your ears or clearing your throat a little too much. Although you should go unnoticed, you should make your friend understand that he needs to come and get you out of the conversation.
- The friend can walk over and say, Sorry to bother you, but I need to talk to you. So it's your turn to apologize when you go.
- Your friend can also take part in the discussion to make it more exciting, if it is possible to escape.
Step 3. Ask to be introduced to someone else
Here's another neat way to escape a boring conversation. Look around the room for someone who you would like to be introduced to, even if you don't want to be introduced to the person. It could be a work acquaintance or someone from your social circle that you have not yet met. Ask the person you are talking to to introduce the two of you. So, hopefully, you might get a more interesting discussion. You could use the following sentences.
- Hi, isn't it Jean, Marie's boyfriend? I have heard him praise his merits more than once without ever having met him. Could you introduce it to me?
- It's Mr. Durand, the production manager, isn't it? I've been emailing him all week, but we haven't really met yet. Please can you introduce it to me? I would appreciate.
Step 4. Leave as soon as the others join in the conversation
While this scenario is not very common, if you were too shy or embarrassed to ask to leave, then it would be an optimal move. Wait for one or two people to join in, so that the conversation resumes its normal course. Once this has happened, say goodbye to everyone and then apologize for having to leave. This way, whoever you were speaking with initially won't feel upset and just think it's time for you to walk away.
Step 5. Invite the person to join you in doing something
This is also another classic method here that is also kind of an excuse to leave someone, but in a slightly nicer way. Tell the person you want to do something, then invite them to join you. If she refuses, then you've won: you've just saved yourself from a boring conversation. However, if she does agree to join you, then see it as an opportunity to meet other people along the way and try to lose track of your original conversation. You could therefore have the following sentences said.
- In fact, I am very hungry. I must go get some cheese and cookies right away. Do you want to follow me to go?
- Looks like my glass is almost empty. How do you feel about going to the bar?
- Oh, it's Jean-Pierre Andrevon, the famous writer. I tried to introduce myself to him all evening and finally he was on his own. Do you mind coming with me?
Part 2 of 3: find an excuse to leave
Step 1. Say you need to talk to someone
It is also another classic method that has proven itself. If you really want to get out of a boring conversation, you can say you have to go talk or meet someone else. While it might sound a little mean, give it an important tone so that the person understands how serious you are. Here's how you can go about it.
- In fact, I had planned to ask Mr. Durand a question about the annual report. Excuse me.
- I have to talk to Marnie about carpooling for Marseille this summer. See you later.
Step 2. Use the excuse of having to go to the bathroom
This is arguably the easiest way to get out of a boring conversation. It can be a little embarrassing to say I have to go to the little corner or I have to take a pee. So you can just say, If you will excuse me and nod your head in the direction of the toilet or make it pretty clear what you're going to do. No one can doubt the condition of your bladder, and that is about the strongest excuse you can have.
- You may find a more elaborate reason for using the bathroom, like taking your allergy medication, getting a dust in your eye, or you need to do something that can only be done in private.
- You just need to make sure you actually go into the bathroom if that's what you said you wanted to do. If you don't, you could really upset the person.
Step 3. Say you are going to get more food or drink
This is always a strong case for getting out of a boring conversation. If you are chatting with someone and notice that the discussion is losing interest very quickly, scramble to sneak your glass out and say you need to go get another drink or snack. These are very good reasons to drop a conversation at a party, as long as you phrase them nicely. This is perfect if you notice a friend or acquaintance standing by the bar with crisps or salsa sauce. You can say the following sentences.
- I am so thirsty. Excuse me, I have to take some water.
- These Christmas cookies are so delicious, I can't help but eat them! They are too good. See you later.
Step 4. Say you are helping a friend
This is a pretty absurd excuse, but you can try it. Be smart and act like your friend, leading an interesting conversation, is the one who needs to be saved from the land of boredom. Look at your friend, then turn to the other person and say the following sentences.
- Oh no, Anne is signaling to me that she needs to be rescued as soon as possible. Glad I got to chat with you, but she needs me there.
- Mashed up, I promised Elizabeth that I wasn't going to leave her stuck in a conversation with her boyfriend at the party. I have to go break the mood before she gets mad at me.
Step 5. Say you need to make a call
While that isn't the brightest excuse to end a conversation, it will do. If you are a good actor or actress and you can really make up a story, or if you are able to make your comment quite natural, the other person will believe you without hesitation. There are several great reasons to make a call, especially if your conversation revolves around how to bake zucchini bread. Here are some kind words to apologize.
- I'm sorry, I've been playing cat and mouse all day with this real estate agent. I have to call him back to find out about the offer of a house.
- It seems my mom just called me back. I need to give him a call to find out what to bring for dinner.
- It looks like I just missed the call from the man who interviewed me today. Let me listen to my answering machine.
Step 6. Say you have to get back to work
Here's yet another classic excuse to get out of a boring conversation. It is true that it does not work at birthday parties, but it does work on all other occasions, whether you are gardening or taking a lunch break at school or in the service. To end a conversation for this reason, you can do the following.
- I'm sorry, but I have to go back to work. I have to answer about 30 emails before I get home.
- I would love to continue this discussion, but I have a big chemistry exam coming up and I haven't prepared at all.
- I wish I could hear more from you about your passion for stamp collecting, but I promised my dad that I would do the housework tonight.
Part 3 of 3: Conclude
Step 1. Give clues with your body language
Now that the conversation is drawing to a close, you can let your body language do some of your dirty work for you. Back away slowly, first step away from the speaker and try to turn your back a bit. You should do this without being rude, but just to signal that it is almost time for you to go. You can do this right before you find an excuse to leave the person or announce your departure.
Step 2. Go back to the reason that started the conversation
If you started talking to the person for a specific reason, then remember the purpose of the conversation to wrap it up and get it all done. This will show the person that you were interested in the topic of the conversation and that you weren't totally bothered by what they said. It will also give the impression that the discussion is closed. To end this discussion, you can do the following.
- I'm glad we got to talk about your trip to Tahiti. Next time you decide to take a walk there, give me a call.
- Well, it seems to me you've got it all figured out about the Peterson report. I look forward to reading it very soon.
- I'm glad you are starting to enjoy life in Nice. It always makes me happy to meet a new friend in my favorite environment.
Step 3. Close the conversation physically
After the conversation is over for real, you should shake the person's hand, wave or pat the person on the shoulder, depending on the context of the situation. It helps signal that you are leaving. However, if you enjoyed the person's company and want to see them again, then you can swap your numbers or business cards. Give her the benefit of the doubt, maybe she won't be so boring next time.
Step 4. Say goodbye in a kind tone
Even if the person has been the most annoying, there is no reason to be rude if they are only trying to be nice. Compliment her, say it was a pleasure chatting with her, or say you're glad you met her. You are doing all of this just to be polite, there is no question of feeling bad if the conversation with the person was in fact a purge. It won't cost you anything to be nice to someone. The only reason you shouldn't be is because the person doesn't want to leave you alone anymore. In this case, you should politely explain that you don't have enough time and that you need to catch up with some friends. To say goodbye in this kind of tone, follow these steps.
- I'm glad we got to meet. It's good to know that Sam has so many wonderful friends.
- It was a pleasure to chat with you. It is certainly not easy to meet a Knicks fan in Paris!
- Glad to see you again, I'm sure we'll meet again very soon.
Step 5. Do what you say you want to do
This is one of the crucial aspects when it comes to ending a conversation. It may sound trite, but some people are so relieved by the thought of breaking out of a boring conversation that they forget to stick to the excuse they put forward. If you said you wanted to go to the bathroom, do it… If you said you wanted to go talk to François, go join him. If you said you were hungry, eat at least a handful of carrot sticks. You shouldn't make the person you are talking to feel bad by making it clear to them that you are just lying, in order to leave them.
Once you've done all of the things you say you want to do, you're free! Enjoy the rest of your day or evening away from the threat of another boring conversation
- Remember that if you are in a boring conversation group, it is okay to walk away spontaneously. It is generally more acceptable to skip between conversations during a social gathering.
- Smile politely and nod selflessly.
- Pretend someone is calling you from across the room or your phone is vibrating. Apologize and leave abruptly.
- If you don't like the person at all and don't want to talk to them, just tell them you're not interested in a conversation with them.
- Be careful when telling someone you don't want to chat with them. The person may be talking to you because they feel lonely or are not very good at conversations.
- Don't suddenly stop talking to him and ignore him. This is nasty and could make you an enemy.