How to tell if a girl is playing with a boy's feelings

How to tell if a girl is playing with a boy's feelings
How to tell if a girl is playing with a boy's feelings

When you are just starting a relationship with a girl you like, you might hear a small voice telling you that she doesn't like you that much and that this is all game for her. It's natural to be insecure when revealing yourself to someone, and a manipulative relationship can cause significant emotional damage. To determine if this relationship is healthy or not, pay attention to the signs.


Part 1 of 3: have an open-hearted conversation

Know if a Girl Is Playing Games With a Guy Step 1

Step 1. Ask her how she feels about you

There are many ways to read signs, but the easiest approach will be just to be direct with your girlfriend. Ask her if she really likes you, and don't be afraid to say that sometimes you doubt her feelings for you. If you ask him over and over again, you might end up annoying him, but it's okay to ask him the question. Don't blame him, just let him know about your concerns.

Know if a Girl Is Playing Games With a Guy Step 2

Step 2. Tell her how you feel about her

It might find it difficult to open up emotionally to someone you suspect is playing with you. But it might actually be the perfect solution. If you are sincere and she knows how you feel, she will be more easily sincere with you. If she plays with your feelings, then she might understand that your relationship isn't a joke on you.

Know if a Girl Is Playing Games With a Guy Step 3

Step 3. When you suspect her of playing with you, tell her

Don't be passive and aggressive at the same time, just tell her that sometimes her behaviors hurt you. No one is completely heartless: if they play with you, they might stop realizing that they are hurting you. Again, don't get upset. Just tell her calmly that some of her behaviors make you sad.

Part 2 of 3: Evaluate if the relationship is healthy

Know if a Girl Is Playing Games With a Guy Step 4

Step 1. See if she seems invested in the relationship

Is her attention to you constantly changing? Does she talk about other people she likes? These could be signs that she isn't taking your relationship very seriously.

  • Nonetheless, her behavior could match an image she wants to portray in public. For example, if she is more emotionally and emotionally available when you are alone, maybe she is just shy in public. Don't be unnecessarily suspicious.
  • Talking about other boys sometimes doesn't have to be a bad sign. She might just have close friends. However, if she talks very often about her attraction to another boy, it's because she doesn't really like you.
Know if a Girl Is Playing Games With a Guy Step 5

Step 2. Pay attention to how she talks about your relationship

Does she deny being in a relationship with you when speaking with other people, even her closest friends? If she tells her friends that she is not dating you, she might be behaving manipulatively.

Sometimes people like to keep a budding relationship a secret, in case things don't turn out well. However, once you're actually together and aren't seeing other people, she shouldn't be afraid to tell her friends about it

Know if a Girl Is Playing Games With a Guy Step 6

Step 3. Determine if you feel confident in your relationship

You should feel physically and emotionally comfortable in your relationship. If you feel like you're walking on eggshells or constantly waiting for the next seizure, your relationship isn't healthy. It’s just a sentiment, but you probably already know the answer to this question.

Know if a Girl Is Playing Games With a Guy Step 7

Step 4. See if she is interacting with your friends and family

In a healthy relationship, your partner should make the effort to politely interact with the people who matter to you. If she consistently puts your friends and family down, she might try to isolate you from these people. Whether she does it consciously or not, this behavior is unhealthy and manipulative.

Know if a Girl Is Playing Games With a Guy Step 8

Step 5. Ask your friends for advice

If you're paranoid, your friends might keep you from worrying about nothing and will tell you that you worry about nothing. And if they think your concerns are justified, they will be honest with you. A lot of times people want to support their friends' romantic relationships, even if they think something is wrong. Your friends may just be waiting for you to hand them a pole to tell you that they think this girl is playing with you. They just didn't dare tell you for fear of hurting you.

Part 3 of 3: Noticing manipulative behaviors

Know if a Girl Is Playing Games With a Guy Step 9

Step 1. Notice his temper tantrums

If she frequently sulks when you disagree with her or tell her that you are not available to do something with her, maybe you should be concerned. If she seems upset when you don't do what she wants, then that is a really bad sign. People have a right to be upset, but she shouldn't use her emotions to manipulate you.

  • For example, if she gets upset that you don't invite her out to dinner or give her gifts often enough to her liking, you should think about the nature of her motives.
  • See if she's doing things for you. In a healthy relationship, both parties should be prepared to make small sacrifices to support the other person. That doesn't have to mean spending money, it will even be a better sign if she's willing to change her plans (as far as is reasonable) to be with you in the important times.
Know if a Girl Is Playing Games With a Guy Step 10

Step 2. Beware of jealousy

If she tells you that you can't be friends with other girls because she worries her, you should take a step back and assess the situation. It's one thing for her to tell you that she is sometimes suspicious of other girls, but it's another when she completely prevents you from seeing your friends. This is manipulative and domineering behavior.

Know if a Girl Is Playing Games With a Guy Step 11

Step 3. Beware of blackmail

You might be flattered to hear her say that she couldn't bear to have you leave her, but it is actually emotional blackmail, meant to keep you from leaving. If she threatens to tell your family or friends something you did if you don't do what she wants, you should know that this behavior is indicative of an unhealthy relationship. If she tells you that she is going out with her friends every night of the week until you clean the house, that is blackmail too. Perhaps his behaviors are more subtle than these examples, analyze his way of acting in all honesty.

Know if a Girl Is Playing Games With a Guy Step 12

Step 4. Don't let yourself be blamed

It's not healthy to feel constantly guilty in a relationship. If she often says things to you like, "I never thought you could do this or that," or makes you feel guilty about spending time with your friends because she feels lonely, notice her behaviors. Your partner should be supportive, they shouldn't try to make you feel guilty.

Know if a Girl Is Playing Games With a Guy Step 13

Step 5. See if she asks you to give up your plans for her

If you wanted to go to the movies one night, but she asks you to have a party at your house that night, or if she asks you to quit your job so that she can spend more time with you, she might try to manipulate you.

You are both allowed to make reasonable requests to each other. The alarm bell should ring if it asks you to change your plans for trivial reasons or gets angry when you say no


  • The best way to start a relationship is not to become obsessed with your new partner. Being in love is very exciting, but if you let that love become the only source of happiness in your life, you could fall for the worst if the relationship doesn't turn out the way you hoped it would. Keep up with your activities and passions, and try to stay busy when your girlfriend is not with you.
  • If you realize that this girl was actually manipulating you or just wasn't that interested in you, don't let that get you down. Keep in mind that despite what you are feeling now, you will soon meet a girl who you like and who is more like you. The world is full of girls and you will have the opportunity to love more than one.
  • Nothing forces you to end a relationship just because a girl has any of the behaviors listed above. Have an open conversation with her about your concerns and be on the lookout for manipulation attempts if she doesn't want to change.

Popular by topic