If you develop feelings for your best friend, you might feel like stepping out of a plane in a foreign country, all of which looks unsettling and unfamiliar. It takes courage to follow these feelings, it gives you an advantage! But before you start the conversation, think twice and ask for a second opinion. Then, organize to talk to each other face to face. After you share your feelings, the ball is in their court. Follow several strategies to help you move forward, regardless of his response.
Method 1 of 3: Consider your options
Step 1. Wait and see if your feelings are real
Take a step back. Feelings are not facts and sometimes they come and go. Before you go down a path of no turning back, you need to make sure that your feelings are real and that they are romantic feelings.
- First, you need to ask yourself whether you really care about your friend or love her because she is an exceptional person or because she is always there for you.
- Next, ask yourself if your feelings are coming from feeling lonely because you're single, jealous because she's in a relationship, or scared because the dynamics of your relationship are changing.
Step 2. Take into account its availability
Before going to tell her how you feel, ask yourself how she will take the news of your romantic feelings? Is she in a happy relationship right now and will she be amazed when you confess your feelings to her?
- If she's in a relationship, you might try to find out if she's happy. If so, hold back until she's single again.
- Even if she is not happy in her relationship, you can make sure you start a relationship on a healthy basis instead of serving as an emotional cushion after your breakup by giving her some time.
Step 3. Ask yourself if she might be interested
Think about the interactions you have with your best friend. Has she ever sent you any signals that might indicate you're interested in her? For example, has she ever told you that she would date you if you weren't already friends? If you are a woman, has she ever shown interest in same-sex relationships?
Step 4. Ask someone else for their opinion
Ask people who care about you for their opinions. Talk to people who know you both to find out if they think she feels the same way or that it's worth putting your relationship at risk.
Seek advice only from serious, trustworthy people, and make sure they see the situation objectively
Step 5. Realize the possible consequences
Continuing a romantic relationship with a friend can be the best thing that happens in your life, or the worst. If she likes you too, it could create a situation that will make your relationship even more satisfying. If she doesn't like you, it could change the dynamics of your relationship from then on.
However, if you like it, these possible consequences shouldn't change anything. If that doesn't work, you may have to spend some time away from each other, but at least you've had the courage to try and get what you want
Method 2 of 3: Expressing your feelings
Step 1. Make innuendo to see his reaction
Make subtle innuendos about a possible relationship between you and her. You could say something like, "If we were a couple, I'm sure we would spend a lot of time arguing about where to eat, right?" "Or" do you think two people can be friends without ever falling in love with each other?"
Pay attention to her facial expressions and body language in addition to the response she gives you. If she seems to reject the idea, it could mean she isn't interested
Step 2. Think about what you are going to say in advance
If you're still wondering whether or not to share your feelings with her, think about what you would say to her. Prefer a short speech to tell him how you feel, perhaps letting him know how long you have had these feelings.
For example, you could say to her, "I love you very much and these feelings started several months ago. "
Step 3. Find a good time to see you
Call or text her to ask if you can see each other. Let her know that you would like to discuss something important with her.
You might say, "Hey, there's something I would like to tell you. Are you free to talk to each other today at 5 o'clock? "
Step 4. Be direct during the conversation
It's hard enough to explain your romantic feelings to her, which is why you shouldn't beat around the bush. Explain to him the reason for your meeting and let him know how you feel. Be as specific as possible.
- For example, if you are just physically attracted to your best friend and are considering sex, let her know.
- If you are in love with her and want a romantic relationship together, make it clear.
Step 5. Don't pressure him
Once you've told her what's on your mind, don't push it. She might feel too confused to share what she's feeling. She is probably going to need some time to think about it and decide what she wants to do.
Tell him, "I know this is a little unexpected. Take your time to think about it. I don't want you to feel pressured. "
Method 3 of 3: Go forward after your answer
Step 1. Set clear boundaries
Whether your best friend accepts your romantic feelings or rejects your advances, you need to take the time to find out what happens to your friendship. Set limits from now on so you both are on the same page.
For example, if she doesn't feel the same way, you might decide to stop spending time alone together. You might also decide to take a break from the relationship to find out what you want to do now
Step 2. Spend time with others
Distribute your love and friendship all around you instead of just reserving it for your best friend. Start spending time with others as well. Host game nights, go cheer on a friend at a game, or join a club.
- This is something important to do whether or not you want to continue in a relationship together. It’s healthier to have close relationships with more than one person.
- If you decide to start a relationship, you need to make sure you make time for your other friends. You need to keep your friends when you start a new relationship.
Step 3. Work on your insurance
If your best friend rejects you, it might temporarily shake your self-esteem. Focus on improving your confidence by recognizing your strengths and successes. Make a long list of all the reasons that make you an exceptional person.
To really feel stronger, you can start by writing, “I am…” before reciting the list every day
Step 4. Know how to recognize the qualities of your loved ones
While it may be hard to perceive, your best friend doesn't have a monopoly on physical attraction, humor, compassion, or intelligence. There are many other people in your life who have these qualities as well.