How to have a good relationship with your girlfriend

How to have a good relationship with your girlfriend
How to have a good relationship with your girlfriend

While love at first sight dominates the cinematic and media world, building a lasting and meaningful relationship usually takes more work than just dating. Maintaining a healthy relationship over a long period of time requires honest and open communication between partners, but also compromises and a willingness to grow together. If you have had difficulty maintaining a good relationship with your girlfriend in the past, it is important that you reflect on your current relationship and take the necessary steps to remedy the situation.


Part 1 of 3: Communicate Effectively

Avoid a Girl Who Doesn't Love You Back Step 12

Step 1. Have honest and open conversations

If you want to get to know your girlfriend better, you need to talk face to face with her. Sometimes you can't understand things like voice intonation or sarcasm over texting, and you can't observe the other person's body language when you're on the phone. Allow some time to talk openly about everything. You could have a little chat about how she spent her day, or a more serious, constructive conversation about what makes you both happy.

  • Say something like this, I wanted to share my thoughts with you about our relationship. Are you free ?
  • Bringing up sensitive topics will encourage your girlfriend to do the same. It might strengthen your bond. For example, you could talk about your earliest childhood memories, a family tradition you love, your worst fears, or your dearest dreams.
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Step 2. Practice active listening

Active listening is a communication technique that relies on two people participating more actively in a conversation. Getting into the habit of adopting this technique will make your girlfriend like you more. To practice it, you just need to focus on what it is saying without interrupting it. Don't judge or criticize her either, even if she says something embarrassing to you. In fact, it might prevent him from telling you things in the future. Paraphrase her words and ask her specific questions about what she is talking about. If she seems to accept it, give her some helpful and profitable advice.

  • Here is an example of what you might say: so if I understand you, she was immature.
  • Sometimes people just need someone to talk to without getting advice or being judged in return. Wait until she asks for your opinion before trying to help her.
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Step 3. Pay attention to your non-verbal communication

Talking to your partner is not the only mode of communication that exists in a relationship. Non-verbal communication is also extremely important. If you pay attention to your partner's body language, it will be easier for you to know how she is feeling. If she has her arms crossed, it may mean that she is ready to stand up for herself. Or, if she keeps her hands closed, it may mean that she is not interested in your opinion or that she is having trouble saying a word on a topic of discussion.

  • Once you can decipher her body language, you will be able to tell when she is feeling uncomfortable or angry.
  • If she isn't speaking, but has negative body language, try asking her if everything is okay.
  • Make sure you don't send negative signals with your body language.
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Step 4. Don't hurt her when you are angry

Some people tend to bring up negative moments from the past or intentionally hurt their partner during an argument. Don't go all over the place when chatting, and avoid criticizing things that have already happened. Avoid intentionally harming her as this could negatively affect your relationship which can turn into an abusive one.

Work on defusing conflicts in your relationship before things turn sour

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Step 5. Don't yell when you have an argument

Knowing how to manage your anger during a dispute is very important in order to be able to maintain a healthy relationship. Avoid escalating confrontations and avoid yelling at him. When we are aggressive, we tend to get defensive reactions from our interlocutors. If it's your girlfriend screaming or screaming, don't behave like that. Be polite and try to keep it down. Getting even angrier during an argument could make a conversation spiral out of control and damage the relationship in the long run.

  • When someone yells at you, your limbic system is activated and it affects your amygdala, the part of the brain that triggers emotional responses.
  • As soon as you realize that you are about to get upset, take a break and go.
  • You can say something like I'm too angry right now and just need some fresh air. I'll take a walk outside and we'll talk about it when I get back.
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Step 6. Behave in a more civilized manner

Sometimes big arguments are inevitable. When a big argument is about to break out, the best thing you can do is behave in a civilized manner. Not only should you not yell at your partner, but there are things you should avoid in order to have a good relationship with her. Avoid:

  • vulgar words or insults,
  • to throw stones,
  • to use physical force,
  • threaten your partner with separation,
  • make assumptions or make judgments about your partner,
  • tackle the problems of the past or make lots of whining,
  • to interrupt your girlfriend.

Part 2 of 3: Building Lasting Love

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Step 1. Be nice and kind to her

There is a difference between going out to bring gifts for an occasion to your loved one and doing small, lovable things to make her happy. You also don't have to buy things before you make your partner happy. You can simply take out the trash, wash the dishes, or pick a flower from the curb to give it to him. Think about her throughout the day, and think of ways to make her happier and make her life easier.

  • If you don't have enough money, don't buy anything from him, or you might stress yourself out. Instead, think about simple ways to show your gratitude.
  • You can buy her flowers, do the housework, buy her tickets to a show she would like to see, or text her, among other things.
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Step 2. Compliment her

Although you don't need to shower her with compliments all the time. Complimenting her at least once a day can comfort her throughout her day. Make sure the compliment is sincere and comes from the bottom of your heart. Take the time to notice things like her clothing, her makeup or an accessory she has chosen. You don't have to compliment her entirely on her looks. You can also praise her for her success at work, her good grades at school, or if you've noticed that she tries to thrive on a daily basis.

  • You can say something like I like the way you styled your hair today.
  • To compliment her on her personal growth, you can say something like, I noticed you don't have too many problems in physics anymore. It's really great that you could improve yourself so much.
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Step 3. Form a team

It's normal to want to win. However, loving relationships are based more on teamwork than competition. See your success as your girlfriend's success and use it to motivate each other to reach your true potential. Rather than thinking about how you will gain personal benefit from it, think about how it will affect both of your lives.

  • Thinking only of yourself and thriving is important to many people, but know that you are callous when doing things that will hurt your girlfriend and only benefit you.
  • Encourage her to achieve great things in her life. Do not prevent him from thriving or reaching his goals.
  • Working together requires the involvement of both partners. If your partner is unable to take an interest in your dreams and aspirations, it might be time to find a new girlfriend.
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Step 4. Love and take care of yourself

Before you can have a lasting and meaningful relationship with your partner, you need to take care of yourself. Make an effort to sleep well, eat well, and take care of yourself. If you're nervous, overwhelmed, or defensive, there's a good chance you're not taking care of yourself as much as you should. Take a step back and don't be afraid to say no to your partner. If she really cares about you, she will understand that you are overwhelmed and need time to take care of yourself.

  • If you are used to putting your partner's needs before your own, you can become completely dependent on her.
  • You can say something like, I love you very much and I think you are wonderful, but it will take a little while for me to clear this up. It's been a while since I took some time for myself, so I just need to take care of myself.
Act when Your Boyfriend Tells You That You're Beautiful Step 10

Step 5. Earn her trust by being honest

If you think you can't keep a promise, let it be known. Broken promises can seriously damage a relationship. More serious acts like infidelity can end a relationship, as can other acts like little lies. To avoid this, be honest and up front even if you think it will give a bad impression of you.

  • For example, if you're late, give her a call and tell her what's holding you up.
  • If you've done something that you're not proud of or that prompts you to react in a certain way, it's best to tell your girlfriend about it as soon as possible.
  • If she doesn't trust you because of something you may have done before, make a concerted effort to show her that it was a mistake and that you have changed.

Part 3 of 3: solidifying the relationship

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Step 1. Be prepared to compromise

Being stubborn and having too narrow a view can compromise the happiness of a relationship. Instead of being steadfast in your positions, be prepared to listen to your girlfriend. Think about what she is asking you to do and try to find out if it will have a negative or positive impact on your life. Often our partners just want what's best for us. So getting mad at your girlfriend just because she wants things to change isn't the best way to go.

  • There are some things you shouldn't compromise on, like your physical or emotional needs.
  • Do not compromise your moral values ​​at the risk of ending up resenting him.
  • Compromise together to have a happy life.
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Step 2. Be the emotional support she needs

During difficult times, your partner is likely to need more support from you. When she needs help or support, make an effort to be there for her. Instead of getting mad at her and making her feel worse, be understanding and be of great help. Offer to listen to her, without judging her. Try to comfort her by doing kind things to her.

  • If you don't approve of something she did, try to understand why she did so rather than berating or criticizing her.
  • Supporting him is not the same as allowing him to behave in a self-defeating way.
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Step 3. Recognize and talk about tough times

The first step in going through these difficult times is to recognize their existence. Don't ignore or downplay serious issues he might be having in your relationship. Sit down and discuss together how the situation has developed and your willingness to overcome these trials.

  • Even if you don't like expressing your emotions, it's important to do so for the good of the relationship.
  • Try saying something like, I noticed that since your grandmother died you've been pretty depressed. I will always be there to listen to you. Let me know when you want.
  • If you've been upfront and open-minded with her, chances are you'll be the first person she turns to in times of trouble.
  • Even if you think the problem is insignificant, try to understand his point of view.
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Step 4. See a marriage counselor if necessary

If your relationship has reached such a point that you can't understand each other, it may be helpful to seek professional help. A marriage counselor will be able to objectively examine your relationship and provide you with the tools and techniques you need to rebuild it. Search online for psychologists or therapists who specialize in interpersonal relationships and call them to make an appointment.

  • If you think your relationship is worth saving, you may need to see a counselor to overcome social or emotional barriers.
  • Before seeing a counselor, try to be kinder, more loving, and more open to her.

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