You may feel like you never meet the right person. But, you don't have to worry, because you are not the only one in this case! In fact, it's a feeling that almost everyone has had at least once in their life. If you don't feel confident in your body, finding someone to date can seem even more frustrating. What is more important to do is know how to go about building confidence. If you love yourself, then others are more likely to notice your positive attributes. Also, try to find a way to meet someone and turn the relationship you have into a romantic one. Whether you are a teenager or an adult, the methods described in this article can be very helpful to you. Remember that the main thing is to have a positive attitude!
Part 1 of 3: Build Confidence
Step 1. Think positively
Finding the right person can be frustrating. You might feel anxious or even sad. This is completely normal, but know that these kinds of thoughts will not help you find a boyfriend. You have to change your perspective to focus on something more positive.
- Don't be swayed by negative thoughts. If you start to think that you're never going to meet someone, then try to quit. Instead, you should replace that thought with something more positive, like, "I'm proud that I put in the effort." "
- Keep a gratitude journal. Set aside about 5-10 minutes a day to write down everything you are grateful for. This way you will be able to reflect on the positive aspects of your life.
- With this in mind, you could for example write something like: "I am grateful that I had a part in the play with my best friend" or "I am happy with the trust and respect that my parents have. have for me. "
Step 2. Try to focus on your qualities
Each day, try to take time to think about what you value most about yourself. You could choose one of your attributes that you like and compliment yourself out loud on it or try writing it down.
- For example, look at yourself in the mirror and say to yourself, “You have a beautiful smile! "
- You can leave a note on your PC saying, “You are an excellent writer! "
- Hang a note on your closet that says something like, “You are a great singer! "
Step 3. Strive to achieve your goals
Getting there is a great way to build self-confidence. First, set clear goals. Don't forget to include your long-term goals and short-term goals. After that, consider making a plan to achieve each of them.
- As a short-term goal, you could say something like, “I won't go out to eat for a week. You can do this by planning your meals and preparing a lunch to go to work.
- As a long-term goal, you could say, “I'm going to get promoted in a year. »Try to figure out exactly how to achieve this. For example, you could try to have more responsibilities at work.
- It could be something like becoming employee of the month or joining an extracurricular activity.
- Each time you are able to remove the goals you have achieved from your list, you will gain confidence!
Step 4. Develop a positive body image
In today's society, it is really very easy to feel that you are overweight. It's not easy to feel good about yourself when you're continually bombarded with images of really skinny celebrities. But you'll have to make the effort to remember that most of the time these photos are edited and those that aren't are often unrealistic for most people.
- Keep in mind that everyone is different physically, in terms of height, build, and metabolism.
- Think about everything you love about your body. With that in mind, you might say to yourself something like, “I'm happy that I have such strong legs that allow me to take those long walks that I love. "
- Don't be negative. In other words, don't pay attention to any negative comments or any form of bodily shame.
- Try to find a female model with an authentic and balanced appearance. It could be anyone, from your mother to Valérie Damidot.
Step 5. Take care of your appearance
Sometimes you can build your self-confidence by focusing on feeling good about yourself. Take the time to take care of your body and get in shape every day. You will immediately notice that it will help improve your mood!
- Wear outfits that make you more confident. Do you feel better when you put on colorful jewelry? Find a beautiful ruby red sweater that you can wear to work.
- Try a new haircut. Have you always wanted to have shorter hair? If so, don't hesitate! Experimenting with a new look can be a lot of fun and make you feel great.
- Try to light up your smile. A bright smile is the perfect accessory for everyone. Try using whitening strips to brighten yours.
- Don't be afraid to be trendy. Maybe the latest trend in school is high waisted jeans. They don't look good on everyone, and that's okay. Dress according to your figure.
- You could ask a friend for advice. With that in mind, you can say something to her like, "Do you think this tight sweater is right for me?" »Be open to comments.
Step 6. Exercise to improve your mood
You may not feel confident in your body about going to a gym. However, be aware that exercising can really improve mood. In fact, sweating helps you feel good about yourself and increase energy.
- Talk to a coach. Many gyms offer a free introductory session with one of their professionals. Ask for suggestions on the activities and workouts that best meet your needs.
- Try a group class. Bring a friend and sign up for a barbell or spinning class.
- Practice outdoors. Outdoor exercise can allow you to breathe fresh air, get some sun and, at the same time, improve your mood.
- Join a team. With this in mind, you could try a soccer or volleyball team.
Part 2 of 3: Meet a good boy
Step 1. Make a list of your priorities
To find a boyfriend, you need to meet someone to date. Before you go looking for them, you should take a few minutes to think about the type of person you want. With that in mind, make a list of the key characteristics your potential boyfriend is believed to have.
- Having common interests may be one of the most important requirements for you in a relationship. For example, if you like to cycle, you will have to give importance to this aspect to find a boy who also shares this passion.
- Also try to list important character traits like compassion, honesty, and a great sense of humor.
Step 2. Use your contacts
The friends you have and family members are a good resource for finding a boyfriend. In fact, the majority of people say they have met their partner with the help of friends and family. Let your friends know that you are open to meeting new people.
- You can tell your friend something like, “You know, Sarah, I would like to meet someone. Do you know someone who might interest me? "
- You can also say, “Alice, the guy who was sitting next to you in English class looks really nice. Can you tell him about me in a conversation to see if he looks interested? "
- Accept the invitations you receive. You have no idea who will be coming for the barbecue organized by your aunt!
- If you want to develop a positive body image, you may feel more comfortable meeting new people through your circle of friends. After all, your best friend is unlikely to introduce you to someone who will make inappropriate comments about your appearance.
Step 3. Use technology
Nowadays, many relationships are born on the Internet. Forget the old prejudices! Take advantage of the technology and set out to meet the man of your dreams or just hang out with someone for fun!
- Online dating is also a great way to let go if you don't feel comfortable with your body. Usually you will need to post a photo. This way, whoever contacts you will already know (and have already accepted) your appearance.
- Always try to be honest about your profile. For example, you should not post photos from 10 years ago.
- Be careful when meeting someone on the Internet. For example, avoid giving out personal information like your home address or where you work.
- The most trusted dating sites are unlikely to allow teens to join. No problem, you can still use the technology to your advantage.
- Post an ingenious post on Instagram and tag the person you're attracted to. You can also post cute photos of yourself on Snapchat and share them with a group of friends, including the one you are interested in. Thus, you will be sure to catch his attention!
Step 4. Be outgoing
When you meet someone, you should try to focus on the conversation you are having with them. This will allow you to forget about all your weight problems a bit. When you meet a handsome guy at a party, practice your relationship skills and do whatever you can to get in touch with him.
- Be optimistic. Avoid talking about controversial or depressing topics the first time you meet someone.
- Don't be afraid to take initiative. If you find yourself at a party, approach someone with ease and say, “I don't think we've met before. Are you a friend of Sarah? "
Step 5. Prepare to meet someone
It's good to have a plan and trust your knowledge, but maybe you can meet someone almost anywhere. By keeping your eyes open in everyday situations, you can have new possibilities wherever you go. Don't be afraid to start a discussion in the following places.
- At the supermarket, where you could say something like, “I love hummus. Is it a good brand? "
- In the airport waiting room, where you might say something like, “Are you traveling for business or for pleasure? "
- In the cafeteria near you, where you might say something like, “I've never seen you here before. Looks like you don't have the caffeine addiction that I have. "
- University (or school) which is a great place to meet new people. Diversify your activities. For example, you could submit your contribution to the student newspaper so that you can get to know a lot of other people.
Part 3 of 3: Building a Healthy Relationship
Step 1. Try to have reasonable expectations
When you meet someone, don't expect the relationship to turn into something serious right away. Instead, be patient. Allow time to get to know each other.
- If you don't feel comfortable with your weight, don't hesitate to speak up. With that in mind, you might say, “No, thank you. I don't want to share dessert. I try to eat healthy. "
- Remember to be yourself and keep in mind that the guy you want to be is there because he's interested in you.
Step 2. Make connections
As you get to know each other, spend time together to find out what you have in common. Don't be afraid to share what you love and hate with him. For example, you could tell him, “I love horror movies. Would you like to watch one with me next Friday?"
Do things together. It's a great way to make a connection. Try to do something new together. For example, you could take a cooking class or take dance lessons. Learning is also a good way to build your self-confidence
Step 3. Think about having fun
Try not to take things too seriously while you are still in the early stages of your relationship. Having fun is an essential part of any healthy relationship. If you're not having fun with your new boyfriend, or if it's making you doubt yourself, it might be time to reconsider your relationship.
- Laugh together. Go to a coffee shop or watch funny videos on YouTube.
- Show him that you love to play. If you walk past a playground, don't be afraid to take a spin on the swing.
Step 4. Communicate effectively
Communication is a fundamental element in any relationship. To build a relationship, you will need to try to express yourself effectively. Don't be afraid to share how you feel.
- For example, you could say, “I'd rather not spend the day in the pool. I don't feel very sure of myself these days, but I'm trying to change that. Can we find another way to spend the afternoon together? "
- Be direct, honest and respectful.
- Be yourself.
- Be patient, because building a stable relationship usually takes time.
- Have fun. Love to meet new people and try new things.
- If he doesn't like you, but you continue to like him, make a list of all his faults that you know of.