If you feel like your partner isn't romantic enough, it could impact your self-esteem or your happiness in the relationship. If you want your girlfriend to be more affectionate, you have to start by trying to make her happier and make her more comfortable. Show her lots of affection, make romantic gestures, and respond when she needs it. Talk to her about your need for affection and stay open to her emotions to find solutions that will make you and your girlfriend happy.
Part 1 of 3: Communicating With Your Girlfriend
Step 1. Explain what you want
Be honest with her about what you want. Tell her that you would like more kisses and hugs in the relationship. You also need to make it clear to her that you respect her and value her feelings, which is why you don't want to put pressure on her to do things she doesn't want to do.
- By discussing together what you want for your relationship, you will come to come closer to each other and build a bond based on honesty and mutual respect.
- For example, try saying, "I would be really happy if we could be more affectionate to each other. Is this something you would like to do too? "
Step 2. Get his undeniable agreement
Under no circumstances should you try to touch or kiss your girlfriend if she has not clearly expressed her desire for this kind of gesture before. When you discuss how you feel about each other, you need to listen to what she has to say to know what she will and will not accept.
- Do not put pressure on him to agree to you. It’s something she has to knowingly give to you, otherwise it doesn’t count.
- If she asks you to stop something, you must stop immediately. You can ask her how she feels and what is wrong, but only after you stop doing it.
Step 3. Understand their body language
Body language can help you understand a lot about how she is feeling, especially in situations where she might not be comfortable enough to tell you what she is thinking. Even if your girlfriend agrees with your gestures of affection, you should take into account any hints she sends to you to make sure she still appreciates your advances. Stop right away if you notice any of the following signs in their body language:
- it pushes you away;
- she crosses her arms over her chest;
- she turns her face away from yours;
- she assumes a rigid posture;
- she avoids looking you in the eye;
- she changes the subject;
- she looks silent or passive;
- she's crying.
Step 4. Ask him the reason for his lack of affection
If your girlfriend seems more distant or less affectionate than usual, you should discuss this with her. Sometimes, it just takes a little honest communication to solve a problem in a relationship.
For example, try saying, "I really like spending time with you. And I love kissing and hugging you a lot, but you don't seem to like it as much as you used to. Is there a problem or something I can do to improve things? "
Part 2 of 3: Show affection
Step 1. Treat your girlfriend with love and respect
Show her that you care and think about her. It could mean different things, such as offering to hold your hand and helping with difficult tasks. Show her this kind of behavior regularly, but be careful not to suffocate her and force her to do things she doesn't want to do.
- Offer to take you by the hand when you walk in the mall or when you watch a movie together.
- Text her sweetly when she's not feeling well. Try for example: “Hi honey. I was only thinking of you! "
- If she has a lot of chores around the house, you may want to offer to help.
Step 2. Compliment him often
Remind your girlfriend of all the things you love about her. When you think she is beautiful or when you are happy to see her, you should tell her.
- If she's wearing a pretty dress, you can say, “What a beautiful dress! It suits you wonderfully. Summer has officially started! "
- If you notice she's been to the hairdresser, you must say something to her: "Have you had your hair cut? I noticed how beautiful you are. Finally, you are still beautiful! "
- If she achieves something difficult, you have to show her your admiration: “I'm proud of you. I know you are very smart, but I always discover something new with you! "
- Simple compliments are the best. Try to say to him: "you have beautiful eyes", or "your smile makes me capsize". Make sure you give her sincere compliments.
- Avoid the rosewater compliments. If you tell him, "Did you hurt yourself when you fell from the sky, my angel? It's sweet, but if you say to her, "I'm lucky to have you in my life," it sounds more sincere.
Step 3. Give her a gift for no reason
When you go to meet, bring her a special gift. It doesn't have to be something big, like a candy or a funny card. It's a kind gesture that shows her that you care about her and want to make her happy.
- Try to bring him lunch or dinner. If she doesn't expect it, it will be even better. Think about things that appeal to her and bring them to her to share a meal together.
- Write her a love letter every now and then. It doesn't have to be long or sweet. Tell her that you think about her all the time, and how special you find her.
- Remember the things she told you to love and pick one to give her the next time you go out. It will be a tender gesture that will show her that you care about her and that you are listening to her when she talks to you.
Step 4. Stop if she asks you to
Whatever you think of the situation, you should always respect your girlfriend's feelings, especially when it comes to affection and physical contact. You don't have to stop showing your affection for her, but you need to make sure you do so within limits that make her comfortable.
If your girlfriend tells you you're too clingy or isn't exactly affectionate, you need to learn to balance the affection you want to show her and the affection she's ready to receive
Part 3 of 3: Being a Boyfriend She Wants to Love
Step 1. Make her laugh
Laughter together is a great way to connect with your girlfriend and help her feel more comfortable with you. Find jokes online or make your own. Even better, you should find yourself some jokes that only you can understand.
- Have fun together. Imitate celebrities, act out scenes you've been through together, or come up with funny nicknames or jokes that only you can understand.
- Play harmless jokes on him. If she doesn't like jokes, don't overdo it with her or go play somebody else together.
Step 2. Take care of your hygiene
You should wash your clothes regularly, brush your teeth, floss, and use mouthwash. Use a pleasant-smelling perfume or aftershave.
- Remember that you might scare her off by putting on too much perfume or cologne.
- Remember how she feels. If she tells you that she prefers one of your scents more than the others, you should use it before going to see her.
- Wash your hair regularly and let it touch it. It can be a fun, loving way to touch each other, if you both agree.
- Make an effort to look clean and tidy. Even if you prefer a more "hippy" style, you still need to look neat and tidy.
Step 3. Plan special outings
Special outings are great because they are exciting and unexpected. You can show your girlfriend that you really care by organizing an activity that is sure to please her.
- For example, you could go see a yarn, go out to a restaurant, or do some other activity such as bowling, ice skating, a cooking class, or a sports game. If she's passionate about something, you should find a place for her during your outing.
- Ask friends for help. Try planning a surprise birthday party for her with her friends or family if you are close.
Step 4. Make her feel special
Treat your girlfriend like the most important person in the world to you. If she feels special and your number one priority, she will feel more comfortable and relaxed in the relationship.
- Remember to keep making small, loving gestures, such as opening the door for her or asking her what she is thinking.
- If you know she's having a hard time with something, like a problem with her homework, a long shopping list, or a CD she can't find, you can give her a hand. Show her that you are thinking of her even when you are not together.
- Be present when she is sick. Bring her some hot soup, some cold soda, or some movies you can watch together.
- Never forget the flowers. You don't have to wait for a special occasion to give her flowers! A single rose will help her feel appreciated and special.
- When in doubt, always ask him. If you're worried that she might not be totally comfortable with your kissing or hugging, the best thing to do is ask her what she thinks about it and respect her decision.
- Avoid showing affection in public unless she explicitly tells you it's something she likes. Don't touch or kiss her in public (or not) until she tells you that she wants to.
- Don't compliment him on his looks. Just compliment her on her eyes, her hair, her smile, or her clothes.