It can be complex and difficult to pin down feelings and emotions, especially when it comes to deciphering those of someone you know. Are you just an acquaintance? Does she consider you a friend? Is this love or do you just fall in love with this person? There are many levels of relationships and it is not always clear what level you are on with a person. However, if you are looking to find out exactly how a person feels for you and how they perceive your relationship, there are several ways to do this.
Part 1 of 4: reading body language
Step 1. Notice the frequency of eye contact
People's eyes can be very expressive and can say a lot about how they feel about those around them.
- During a conversation, your friends will be more likely to make regular eye contact with you to show you concern and respect.
- Someone you like will be more tempted to make eye contact with you, whether or not you're in the middle of a conversation. She might maintain eye contact for a few minutes and then look away because of her shyness and then meet your gaze again a few minutes later. If you notice that she has dilated pupils, it shows that she wants to flirt with you.
- The one who is in love with you will have no trouble looking at you for a longer period of time.
Step 2. Appreciate your level of closeness
The distance people choose to put between themselves and others can be an indicator that determines how they perceive their relationships with others.
- Someone who sees you as a friend will tend to stay or sit closer to you than a casual acquaintance.
- The one who is in love with you will try to stand near you, lean towards you, and seek to get closer to you for whatever reason. She might try to overtake you on the path by intentionally getting too close to you, or leaning in more than necessary to talk to you.
- Lovers on the other hand, stand or sit very close to each other. Their hips are likely to touch when they are standing side by side or their knees will touch when they are sitting across from each other.
Step 3. Observe his movements
Whether it's done consciously or unconsciously, our movements can say a lot about how we feel about those around us.
- Friends will nod their heads when chatting with other friends to show they are listening. They can touch each other lightly and casually on the hand or arm.
- A person who feels attraction for another will seek by all means to reach the one he loves. She will often do so affectionately or while having fun. She may appear restless or nervous and unconsciously start copying the movements of the one she is feeling.
- The person who is in love with you will feel very comfortable and secure when in your presence. She may touch you gently and give you little hugs.
Step 4. Pay attention to the posture
There are a number of clues you might pick up about how someone feels for you from the way they stand (or sit) around you.
- A friend will stand with their shoulders and face turned towards you. While sitting down, the latter would uncross her legs to show you that she is open to you. The fact that she might also keep her palms open and turned towards you is another sign of receptivity as well.
- When someone has love at first sight for you, they stand up straight and bulge their torso slightly. On top of that, she could turn her feet and hip towards you to show her desire to be closer to you (both literally and figuratively).
Part 2 of 4: Pay attention to verbal cues
Step 1. Recognize the vocal tone
A person will be tempted to change the quality of their voice and their inflection depending on how they feel for you. Pay attention to the way a person speaks in general and compare that to the way they speak to you personally.
- A friend's voice will remain unchanged, with little or no change in timbre or key.
- The voice of someone who literally falls for you will be somewhat playful or flirtatious. Women on the other hand use a more acute and sensual tone to increase their femininity. Men on the other hand adopt a more serious tone, but try to modify it a little to give the impression of singing in order to emphasize their masculinity and to make the woman feel comfortable.
- Lovers will adapt their voices to that of their partner. It is often seen that when men adopt a more serious tone, women do the opposite to show that they are one.
Step 2. Think about the simplicity of your conversations
Discussions between friends are very often simple and light. We ask each other questions and we also answer them in the same way. And we often end up making or not making plans to meet up later.
Step 3. Observe how often she talks about herself
If someone falls in love with you, they'll talk a lot about themselves, as if to ease their nervousness and to charm you a little. She will also ask you to tell her about yourself and seek to show you that you have things in common by enthusiastically accepting what you say.
Step 4. See how private your conversations are
If someone is in love with you, they will confide in you in an intimate way. You may know her deepest uncertainty and fear, her family dynamic, how she spent her childhood, her own most fundamental values and her vision for the future. It is possible that she invites you on her future vacation or offers to meet members of her family.
Part 3 of 4: Analyze your relationship
Step 1. Think about your relationship
Go somewhere calm and quiet and just think for a moment about how you feel for the person in question and how you interact with them. There are a few questions you can ask yourself.
- How long have you known the person?
- How often do you meet or chat?
- Are you having a fair discussion?
- How much privacy do you share (both physically and in your conversations)?
- How would you rate the time you spend together? Do you seem to like being together?
Step 2. Make a list
If you are looking to find out if a person is a friend or a lover, try making a Friends or Lover list. If you want to know if someone is in love with you, try making a list of whether they like you or like you. Like a pro or con list, write down any specific behavior that might let you know how she feels about you. Having a visual aid might give you a better idea of how she feels about you.
Step 3. Ask for help
Ask one of your best friends to help you out. The feelings we have for people can sometimes cloud our judgment when we seek to assess their behavior. Your friend might make honest, objective observations about the relationship and be less likely to let their personal feelings interfere with their judgment.
Part 4 of 4: pose the problem directly
Step 1. First say how you feel
If you want someone to confide in you, be sure to be honest with them as well. If you want people to be honest with you, show that you can also be honest in return. People are more likely to be direct to you if you are direct to them as well.
Try saying, "I want you to know that I feel… for you or that I feel… about our relationship. I hope you will be so forthright and honest with me in telling me how you really feel about me. "
Step 2. Be tactful
Ask the question in a smart, non-threatening way. Let her know that you're just trying to get a feel for your relationship and some clarification in the process, and that you will respect her feelings no matter what. It is important for your partner to know that she can confide in you without worrying that you will become aggressive.
Say, "I want you to know that whatever answer you give me I will honor and respect it fully, even if that's not exactly what I would like to hear." "
Step 3. Prepare for the consequences
Your partner may not feel the same for you. His answer might shock you a bit. Try to take the time to think about what you want to do with the relationship while being aware of how your partner feels for you.