How to ask a boy to be her boyfriend

How to ask a boy to be her boyfriend
How to ask a boy to be her boyfriend

It can be scary for you to ask a boy to be your boyfriend, but it shouldn't be. If you have the right mindset, you can have a meaningful conversation with a boy about the future of your relationship without feeling stressed.


Part 1 of 3: decide if you're ready

Differentiate Between Love and Friendship Step 22

Step 1. Determine if you are ready to commit

You may have a hard time making the decision to commit. There are actually a number of factors that will determine whether or not you are ready to commit to a serious and stable relationship. Each case is unique, and there may be times when you place certain expectations in a relationship. There are a few questions you need to ask yourself.

  • How do I feel for him? Do I feel like I'm happy when we're together? Do I miss him when he's gone?
  • Am I at the moment able to devote the time for a serious relationship? What kind of relationship do I want?
  • Have we ever had an argument in the past? If so, how did we manage to deal with the situation?
  • Does he respect me? Are there any sensitive issues that concern me? Do I have any doubts about his character? Do I trust him?
  • What are my thoughts on monogamy? Do I want to be in an exclusive relationship with only one spouse? If so, am I ready to be monogamous with this boy? If not, are we both willing to be in a relationship with others?
  • Am I doing this because it makes me happy or is it because other people are pressuring me to have a boyfriend?
Know if That Person Truly Loves You Step 11

Step 2. Consider the length of your relationship

Asking that boy you are interested in too soon to be your boyfriend can scare him off if the feelings are not mutual in the meantime. However, confusion can set in and there is also a good chance that the feelings will be hurt if you wait too long. Since every relationship is unique, know that there is no set period of time that you have to wait before asking a boy to be your boyfriend. Just trust your instincts and if you think the timing is right, go ahead.

  • If you've just met the boy, you might have to wait until you have a few dates together before suggesting that he be your boyfriend. In fact, you should avoid getting into a relationship with someone you just got to know.
  • Some people ask their spouse to enter into a stable and exclusive relationship with them within a month or after having had about six dates.
  • Others wait three months to go out together before initiating a discussion.
  • If you are in a long distance relationship, you may need to initiate this discussion as soon as possible. This will allow you both to understand what you hope for from each other, even if you are far apart.
Act Around a Guy You Like Step 15

Step 3. Find out if the boy is interested

It is important that you can have clues that let you know how the boy you like feels about you. The only credible way to be sure is to ask her, but you can look for clues that could better situate you about her feelings.

  • When a boy refers to plans for the future, it could be a sign that he plans to stay with you.
  • If he praises you around him, especially his friends, it will probably mean that he is proud to be with you.
  • If he's texting you throughout the day to hear from you, it could mean he's constantly thinking about you.
  • If you see each other several times a week and hang out together every weekend, this could be a sign that he is more interested in you.
Start a Conversation When You Have Nothing to Talk About Step 9

Step 4. Prepare to be rejected

Even if you think he'll be okay with being your boyfriend, keep in mind that he might say no. He may not be ready to commit to a serious relationship, or he may not like the idea of ​​using certain expressions to describe your relationship. Think about how you will react when he refuses to be your boyfriend.

  • If you want to have a serious relationship with someone who will be committed to you, you might have to leave this guy if he says he doesn't want to be your boyfriend. It will also allow you to find a person who also wants a serious relationship.
  • If you are happy with your relationship, you may decide to maintain your current status until he is ready to be your boyfriend.
  • If you have strong feelings for this boy, you may need to decide whether or not you want to date him afterwards. For example, you may decide to remain friends or to cut all contact until you get over the situation.

Part 2 of 3: picking the right time

Lose Weight from Your Face Step 1

Step 1. Plan

It will be easier for you if you know when to ask her to be your boyfriend. You can practice for the discussion in advance or determine a good time to bring up the topic. There is no right time to ask a boy to be your boyfriend. It is therefore up to you to make a good judgment on your personal situation.

  • Some people schedule a special date and lead that discussion at the end of it. Others find this kind of conversation the most natural when spending time together alone. Either way, you need to pick a good day in advance.
  • Avoid making the request when the boy will be stressed, busy, or upset. He might be surprised by the question, and it may affect his answer.
  • If you are anxious or nervous, you can practice what to say ahead of time. You can try to start the conversation and answer the questions by looking in a mirror.
Decide on a Partner Type Step 7

Step 2. Arrange a face-to-face meeting

You might be tempted to text a guy asking him to be your boyfriend, but these kinds of topics are best addressed and discussed face to face. This approach allows you to explore different possibilities for your relationship. In case your lover has any questions or concerns, you can bring them up and resolve them together.

If you're in a long-distance relationship, chances are it won't be easy to arrange a face-to-face meeting. If you are given the opportunity to conduct this conversation while traveling, you may have to wait until the end of your request, in case you receive a negative response from them. If you can't ask him face to face, the other great option you have is to call him

Kiss a Girl Step 2

Step 3. Identify a good place for the conversation

There isn't a great place to have a couple's chat, but you need to make sure you choose a place where the two of you can express your feelings and discuss your future together. Think about what works for both you and him.

  • You will most likely have to conduct this discussion while the two of you are alone. For example, you can bring up the issue during a walk on the beach, at someone's house or in the park.
  • If you both have a place that you are particularly fond of, such as a favorite monument or the place of your first date, you may decide to have the discussion take place there in order to make it memorable.
  • Make sure the boy is not distracted. Avoid asking him to be your boyfriend at the movies, while he is working, or when you go out with friends.
  • If you tell him about it while eating out or in the car, he might feel trapped. You should therefore ensure that the discussion takes place in a place that is convenient for both of you.
Tell a Guy You Like Him Step 7Bullet1

Step 4. Bring up the topic at the right time

If you have planned to distract yourself throughout the day, you need to focus on staying relaxed. It is important that you can wait until the right time to bring it up with him. Take your time to find a niche that you feel is "appropriate" or "special" and in case you are having difficulty doing so, there are some basic guidelines you can follow.

  • If he gives you compliments, you can also give them back, starting with a discussion about what you like about each other. This is a logical continuation in the couple's conversation.
  • You can bring up the subject when you notice that there is a moment of silence. Express how happy you are at the moment and wait and see if the discussion gets started.
  • At the end of your date, you can express yourself like this, "wait, I want to tell you something before you go." ".
Get a Girl to Be Your Girlfriend Step 5

Step 5. Wait until your sweetheart brings up the subject

If you're in no rush to call him “boyfriend,” it's best to wait and see if that boy you're in love with will bring up the topic first. This way of proceeding also lets you know if it is okay for her to use affectionate expressions to describe your relationship. This might be a good option if you are unsure of your feelings or feel that he is showing uncertainty about the relationship.

Don't always be around waiting for a boy to bring up these kinds of topics first. Set a date before you ask her. For example, you can give him a period of one month before bringing up the subject yourself

Part 3 of 3: broaching the subject

Act Around a Guy You Like Step 10

Step 1. Start with a compliment

Tell him what you like about him. This flattery will make him relaxed and make it easier to tackle relationship issues. Complimenting his intelligence, his sense of humor or his kindness is a good way to express what you think of him.

  • You can put it this way, "you know you're so funny. I had never met a boy like you. "
  • The other good compliment you can give is: “You are very caring, I am so touched by your actions. "
  • In case he thanks you, smiles, or gives you compliments in return, it could be a positive indicator that he feels the same way for you.
Get a Girl to Be Your Girlfriend Step 2

Step 2. Explain how you feel about him

The moment you start on a positive note, it will be easier for you to get down to explaining how you feel about him. If after giving him compliments you notice that the boy is reacting positively, you might be better off paying more attention to your feelings. Take the trouble to explain to him how you feel about him. For example, you can tell her that until now you have enjoyed the time together or that you are starting to have feelings.

  • For example, you can say “I had so much fun with you so far. You are truly an exceptional person and I have thought a lot about our relationship. "
  • At this point, you should avoid telling her that you love her. He might be scared or worried that the relationship is moving too quickly. Instead, you can say that you “have feelings” for him or that you “like him”.
Kiss a Boy for the First Time Step 11

Step 3. Ask the boy if he wants to be your boyfriend

It is best if you can ask him directly whether or not he is ready to be your spouse. You can approach the issue in different ways depending on the situation.

  • You can put the request directly in these terms: "Do you want to make this relationship official?" ", " Do you want to be my boyfriend ? "
  • In case you are unsure about the status of your relationship, you can ask the following: "Where do you think this relationship is leading us?" "
  • If one of you is dating more than one person, you can ask the following question, "Do you want us to start dating exclusively?" "
  • If you want to understand what he thinks of you, you can put it this way, “I want to know what to say to others when they ask questions about our relationship. Would you say that you are my boyfriend? "
Get a Girl to Fall in Love with You Step 25

Step 4. Clarify your expectations

The two of you might have different ideas about what a stable relationship means. He may be ready to go out exclusively with you, but not to meet your family members. Maybe he also wants to have sex when you want to be patient first. When leading the discussion, you both need to be clear about what you expect from the situation.

  • You can start this discussion by asking him the following question "What does being a boyfriend mean to you?" "
  • Respond honestly if he asks you about your expectations in a relationship. For example, you can say the following, "I expect a boy to be honest and loyal to me." At the moment, I am not ready to get married, but I am willing to explore the possibility of a more serious relationship. "
Tell if a Guy Likes You More Than a Friend Step 1

Step 5. Give him time to respond

The boy you ask to be your boyfriend might feel uncomfortable or stressed about the question. If you notice that he seems uncomfortable, hesitant, or nervous, you better give him a day or two to think about his response. Even if he sounds like he wants to commit, he might just need some time to think about it and decide whether or not he's ready for it.

  • You can put it this way, “It's okay if you need time to think it over. So take some time before you decide. "
  • If he asks for space, give it to him by leaving him alone. You can say this, "How long do you think it takes to figure this out?" »Make an effort not to bring up the subject again until this time has passed.
  • In case he does not give you a specific deadline, you can ask him again after a few days. Your statement can be boiled down to this, “Hi, I just want to know if you've had time to think about our relationship. Have you made a decision about where we are at? "
  • Avoid calling or writing obsessively about the topic. In case he doesn't give you a clear answer straight away, you can write to him the first time after asking the question and a second time in a day or two. Leave him alone if he feels the need to make up his mind.
Tell a Guy You Like Him Step 4

Step 6. Handle rejection in an elegant way

If he says he doesn't want to be your boyfriend, then you need to make an effort to keep a positive attitude. Smile and make sure he knows you understand. If you behave this way, he might want to quit dating or just stick with a non-binding relationship. So you need to think about how you are feeling before continuing.

  • In case he wants to end the relationship, just respect his choice. Thank him for the time you spent together, but still say that you understand. For example, you can express yourself in the following way: “I'm sorry to hear that, but we had a lot of fun. I wish you good luck for the future. "
  • If he wants to continue a relationship without commitment, while on your side you want to break up, you can express yourself in these terms: “I think in this case that it is better that we stop seeing each other."In case he asks you the reasons behind your decision, you can answer this" it looks like we don't want the same things. ".
  • He might say he wants you two to stay friends. Only accept this if you are ready to be simple friends. If you find it difficult to maintain this kind of relationship, just be honest and say so. You can say something like this: “I'm not sure this will work for me. You're a good guy, but I think I'll need to be alone. "
  • Some boys may stop contacting you. It's okay to be upset about this, but that doesn't necessarily mean he hates you. He may only feel embarrassed about the situation.


  • Once you are a couple, you need to take some time to examine yourself before moving your relationship forward. Despite the fact that every relationship evolves at its own pace, the boy you are in love with may not be ready to take more serious action, like settling down with you or getting to know your parents.
  • Be clear about what you want in a relationship so that no one gets hurt.
  • Several relationships operate on the basis of different conditions and schedules. Don't be ashamed or in a hurry if yours doesn't keep pace with your friends.


  • Avoid bothering or harassing a boy to be your boyfriend. The best thing to do is move on if you notice he's not interested.
  • It is completely normal to feel depressed, upset, or sad after being rejected. Try to distract yourself from activities you enjoy and spend time with your friends.
  • Don't get upset if a boy says he doesn't want to be your boyfriend. There are several reasons that can lead him to say no. He might not be in the right position to be in a relationship, or the two of you might not be right for being together.

Popular by topic