Asking someone on a date can be stressful and make you anxious. If you've ever felt overwhelmed or unsure about how to approach a girl on a date, know that you're not the only one. The stress of offering a girl an invitation, combined with the fear of rejection, prevents many people from taking the first step towards romantic relationships. In France, almost almost half of the population (around 40%) is single. Fortunately, there are some simple strategies and techniques that can help you date someone and get over your fears.
Part 1 of 3: approaching a stranger
Step 1. Look her in the eye and smile
Eye contact and a smile are two universal signs of flirting. Looking at a girl from across a room lets her know you're noticing her. When you smile, you show her that you want to talk openly with her and that she interests you or that you like her physique. However, don't force yourself to smile and avoid staring at her.
- You could meet people at school, at work, in a grocery store, in a bar or in other social situations.
- When you smile, your brain also releases endorphins that make you happier and can cause positive reactions in other people.
- Maintain eye contact for two to three seconds before looking away. If you look back and that girl you like is still looking your way, that's a good sign because she's trying to meet your gaze.
Step 2. Assess her body language
You could learn a lot about people by the way they look at you or behave. For example, if a girl walks up to you and leans in your direction, she might like you. If she crosses her arms and legs or points her knees away from you, that probably means she isn't interested in you. Here are some other signs to watch out for.
- If she smiles back at you, your presence probably doesn't bother her.
- If she looks you in the eye for more than two seconds, she's likely to want to chat with you.
- If she avoids your gaze, seems uncomfortable, or avoids you altogether, she is unlikely to be interested in you.
Step 3. Introduce yourself
Once you determine that she likes you, you can introduce yourself. Approach her confidently, standing up straight and keeping your shoulders back. To get started, shake his hand and say hello. Start the conversation by asking her name or by bringing up a general topic of discussion.
- You could say something like this, “Hi, my name is Marc. This group is fantastic. What do you think ? "
- Carefully observe his body language and facial expressions. If she looks disgusted, disinterested, or scared, don't bother introducing yourself.
Step 4. Start the conversation
Once you introduce yourself and feel like she's receptive, you can start talking to her. Ask her simple questions like "How was your day?" "Or" Do you live in the neighborhood? If you feel like the discussion is starting to get boring, ask her about it. Listen actively to her, paying attention to her responses. Improve your communication and listening skills by making comments, avoiding judgment and responding appropriately. Instead of waiting for your turn to speak, think and listen to what she says, showing her that you really want to chat with her.
- You could improve your listening skills by summarizing or repeating what he said. For example, if she told you that she loved an artist before he became famous, you might say this: “As I understand it, you preferred their underground music to their new pop trend, right? "
- Here are some great questions to start a conversation: What do you like to do in your spare time? What is your favorite music ? Are you a student? Are you an art fanatic? What is your favorite movie ?
- Do not ask these questions independently. Instead, include them in the conversation. For example, say this: “I just watched Guillermo Del Toro's very latest and I find this film amazing. What are your favorite movies? "
Step 5. Listen to her carefully
Listening to her carefully will help you understand if she wants to see you again. If she mentions a partner during the discussion, chances are she won't agree to date you. If she seems happy and excited to chat with you, she's likely to want to see you again.
If she completely avoids eye contact and responds briefly, she's probably trying to make you understand that she isn't interested
Step 6. Ask him to go out with you
If she seems comfortable and happy during the chat, there's a good chance she'll say yes if you invite her out on a date. Ask him for his contact details first, then try to suggest that he meet with you in the future. The thought of asking the question can be stressful, but don't wait too long or you risk losing your only chance.
You could say this: “It was a real pleasure to have had this discussion with you. Would you like to see each other again? "
Part 2 of 3: Offer a date to an acquaintance
Step 1. Ask her about her romantic life
Find out if this girl you like has a boyfriend or if she doesn't want to date someone right now. As you already know her, you'll have less trouble starting a conversation without giving the impression that you like her. Ask her about her dating situation and find out if she's ready to date someone.
- You could start the conversation by saying something like this, "Are you currently dating someone or are you free?" "
- You could also say this: "I thought you always saw Paul again, or are you not together anymore?" "
- If you notice that she doesn't have a fixed relationship, you could say this to her: "I have the impression that you have very few romantic dates, or are you trying to devote yourself to studies?" "
- Do all you can to talk to her, so that she opens up and reveals her romantic desires to you.
- In some cases, people choose to remain single because they are too busy studying or working, because they have just broken off a relationship, or because they enjoy living alone.
- Some single people decide to stay single.
Step 2. Try to figure out if there is chemistry between the two of you
At this point, you already know that you like this girl, but that doesn't mean it's mutual. Determine if there is any romantic chemistry between you by thinking about the times you had together and try to find out if there is any sexual tension between you when you are dating. Try to think about the things you have in common and how you feel about each other.
- If you're in a platonic relationship, asking a friend on a date can make her uncomfortable.
- If you often joke or flirt with her, chances are the chemistry already exists.
Step 3. Find out what his interests are
Try to learn more about her. Ask her about the things that make her happy. Have deep, genuine conversations and be the first to open up. If you tell her what your passions are, she will feel encouraged to do the same. Find out what she likes, what she doesn't like and her favorite hobbies. Use this information to organize a date that will impress her greatly.
- If she likes to stay at home, you can watch a movie together on TV instead of going out.
- If she likes going to parties, you could invite her to the nightclub or bar.
- If she loves the theater, you can learn more about upcoming shows in your neighborhood.
Step 4. Ask him to go out with you
Once you feel comfortable and are sure to invite her out, call her on the phone or try to have a face-to-face chat with her. Do not anticipate the meeting too much and do not think too much about it. You risk setting unrealistic expectations and being disappointed if things don't go the way you want them to. Just ask the girl if she would like to go out with you, specifying the date and time.
- You could say this, "Hi, I know you love musicals and there will be Wicked in the theater soon." Would you like to come with me next Friday? "
- If she can't come because she already has an engagement, ask if she's ready to postpone the outing to a day when she's free.
Part 3 of 3: Indirectly Offer a Date to a Girl
Step 1. Suggest the date by text or on the Internet
The stress of suggesting a girl on a date can be too overwhelming for some. If this is your case, you might try to overcome it by inviting that girl you like over text. The downside is that she doesn't have to respond, and due to technical issues she may not even read your message.
- You could write this: “Hi! This weekend, I'll be going to see Avengers: Infinity War. Would you like to come with me? "
- If she doesn't respond, don't obsess over it. Wait a few hours before sending another message.
Step 2. Ask a friend to act as an intermediary
If you don't have the girl's contact details or if you can't ask her yourself, you could ask a mutual friend for help. Contact your friend and tell him that you would like to date that girl you like. Tell him where you would like to meet her and at what time so that he can pass the message on.
- You could say this: “Hi! I like Carine a lot, but I'm too nervous to ask her out on a date. Could you ask her to meet me after class? "
- In some cases, if you let a friend know that you are interested in a girl, they might contact you if they like you as well.
Step 3. Offer a date indirectly during a conversation
There are a few methods you can employ that will make your job even easier. One of them is to phrase the question as a suggestion. For example, you can say this: “What are you doing this weekend? If she hesitates in her answer, you could always say something like this, "I was going to the movies." Would you like to come with me since you have no plan?"