Having poor grades in class can be a disappointment for many parents. All parents want to see their children do well in school, and if you bring home a bad grade, they might feel frustrated or disappointed. However, punishment is generally not an effective method of dealing with the problem. If your grades are low, be honest with your parents. Be prepared to work with them to resolve the matter. This shows that you are taking steps to prevent the problem, and your parents may find the punishment unnecessary.
Part 1 of 3: chatting with your parents
Step 1. Don't hide anything from them
If you got a bad grade on a review, be upfront about the problem right away. It might help you avoid getting punished. Your parents want you to do well in school. If you tell them that you are really having difficulty in school, they will try to find a solution rather than punishing you.
- You probably know that your parents will find out about the bad news soon. For example, you may receive your report card or there may be a parents' meeting at school soon. If so, let them know in advance. Tell them something like this: “Daddy, mommy, I want to be honest with you. I'm having a really hard time doing algebra and my grades for this semester are not at all satisfactory. "
- When you want to discuss this problem with your parents, choose a good time to do so. Pick a time when they are free and have no other time constraints. For example, you can choose to have this discussion on a Wednesday evening when everyone comes home from work or school.
- Honesty is the best policy in this case. Tell your parents that you are having a hard time doing a particular subject. If you already know your grade, let them know. Don't try to cover up the truth. For example, if you had a 10/20 in chemistry, don't say your mark is fair. Instead, put it this way, “I got 10/20 in chemistry and just wanted to tell you about it. "
Step 2. Explain why your grades are dropping
If you got a bad grade, there may be a reason for it. Maybe it is because you really don't understand anything in a subject and in this case they are unlikely to punish you. However, even if it is due to irresponsible behavior on your part, admitting your negligence can help avoid penalties. The purpose of punishment is to teach you to be responsible. If you understand your mistake and intend to improve yourself, your parents might not feel the need to punish you.
- If you're having a really hard time doing it in school, tell your parents. Tell them how you really are doing your best in class. Suppose you have difficulty in algebra. Point out how often you study and always do your homework. They will understand that you are already giving your best and may find you a tutor instead of punishing you.
- However, if you made a mistake, admit it. Ultimately, parents want you to learn from your mistakes so that you don't repeat them. If your poor rating is due to late playing video games, admit it and promise to improve in the future. If you finish learning your lessons, they may not feel the need to punish you.
Step 3. Offer to talk to your teacher
If you already have the willpower to put in the effort to change, they are unlikely to punish you. Tell them that you want to have a discussion with your teacher to prevent this problem from happening again. Remember, your goal is to dissuade your parents from punishing you. Promising to tell your teacher about it shows that you are dealing with the situation with maturity and making arrangements for change. It wouldn't do any good to put more pressure on you right now.
Step 4. Be keen to find a solution
The more mature you are, the better. If you start a conversation angry, you are getting into trouble, since your parents will resent you more. However, if you start a conversation and are keen to find a solution, you can work things out and avoid being punished. Your parents are investing in your life to see you succeed. Ask them to help you improve your grades.
- Be as mature as you can. A little flattery can also help. For example, say something like this, “I know I did something wrong and you raised me better. You are very responsible. Maybe you can teach me how to perform better in school. "
- Accept any decision they make. For example, they may ask you to show them your homework when you finish it. They might also want to meet with your teacher on a regular basis. Whether these rules are stressful or embarrassing, you must accept them. If you cooperate to resolve the problem, you will avoid penalties.
Step 5. Detect any abusive response
It is normal for your parents to be upset or frustrated that you received bad grades. However, an extreme reaction on their part can amount to abuse. If you are experiencing an abusive situation at home, it is important to consider this abuse and seek help.
- Physical abuse involves a parent beating, kicking, punching, or otherwise hurting you. Your parents might believe that physical abuse is normal or is an appropriate response to what they perceive to be bad behavior. They might adopt the principle "who loves chastises well" to discipline you. Be aware, however, that they have no right to subject you to physical violence. This is not normal and not all parents do. If you have been mistreated, that constitutes abuse.
- Abuse can also be emotional. All parents get angry at times and they can yell at you sometimes if they are frustrated. However, if the screaming gets very loud and is accompanied by profanity, insults or threats, you should know that this is emotional abuse. For example, your parents might threaten to kick you out of the house or abandon you when you get a bad grade on your report card. Emotional abuse is also not normal and can seriously damage your own image.
Part 2 of 3: fix the problem
Step 1. Prove that you are responsible
After admitting your bad grades, make an effort to show how responsible you are. If your parents notice that you view relapses as a motivation for change, they will be less likely to punish you.
- Start telling your parents about your grades. Show them any previously graded copies of your assignments, exams, or quizzes. If you receive newsletters regularly, show them to your parents without them asking you to do so.
- Keep them informed of your progress. Don't just tell them you'll talk to your teacher. After the conversation, really do it, then let your parents know. Tell them what the teacher said and any suggestions he may have made to help you in your progress.
Step 2. Make a plan to improve your grades
You can avoid being punished by being willing to work things out with your parents. Together, discuss ways to improve your grades.
- A lot of your plan depends on why your grades are plummeting. If you are having a really hard time understanding a subject, getting a tutor can help. You can also ask your teacher to help you with an assignment.
- If your irresponsible behavior is the cause of your poor grades, there are steps you can take to become a better student. Promise your parents to always do your homework after school. Establish a curfew and try to comply with it. Write homework in a notebook ahead of time so you don't forget to do it.
Step 3. Inform them of personal issues that may affect your grades
There may be several reasons why your grades are dropping. If you have any personal issues affecting your grades, let your parents know. They are going to want to help you get through these difficult times and offer you suggestions for resolving any issues affecting your studies.
- In adolescents, depression is a common problem that can affect their grades. If you've been feeling depressed lately, have suffered from mood swings, have suicidal thoughts, or are obsessed with death and have lost interest in certain activities, you may be suffering from depression. See a therapist to address the problem. If you're worried that you might be depressed, tell your parents.
- Attention deficit disorder with or without hyperactivity (ADD / HD) may be the cause of your condition. This mental disorder is characterized by irritability, lack of concentration and an inability to make decisions. If you think you have this disorder, talk to your parents about getting diagnosed so you can get the treatment you need and get back on track.
- If you have a personal problem, for example if you were bullied in school, you should also discuss it with your parents. In fact, it can affect your school habits.
Step 4. If abused, get help from another adult
If you are facing an abuse situation, it can be difficult to talk about anything with your parents. They might refuse to listen to you or to compromise. In this case, get help from another adult.
- You can get closer to another relative, such as grandparents, an uncle or an aunt. You can also chat with your family doctor if you have the opportunity to speak privately with him. A teacher or school counselor can also help.
- If you don't know anyone to talk to, you can contact Child-help in France. It is a non-profit organization whose mission is to help children living in situations of violence. You can call this organization at the following number: +32 (0) 472/071 861. If you don't dare call from your home, you can use a friend's phone or a phone booth.
Part 3 of 3: moving forward
Step 1. Improve Your School Habits
Once you've worked things out with your parents, try to move on. You can avoid being punished for poor grades by having very good class averages. To do this, seek to improve your school habits.
- Improve your organizational skills. Use a diary or calendar to keep track of upcoming exams and quizzes you take in class. Try to organize your notes according to each subject.
- Study in a distraction-free environment, such as a coffee shop or library. Before studying, turn off your cell phone and other electronic devices. Gather all the books you need before you sit down to study.
- Study for a short interval. Trying to absorb so much information in one sitting can be overwhelming. Study for 40-50 minutes and take a 5-10 minute break between each session.
Step 2. Keep doing your homework
You should also try to do your homework, as home schoolwork counts towards your semester averages. Try to do your after school homework every day before participating in any fun activity, like visiting friends or playing games. You should also be upfront with your parents about your homework, letting them know what it is and when it is due.
You can also jot down your homework in a diary to make sure you get it done on time
Step 3. Receive regular school reports
Transparency is important to avoid punishment. If your parents are worried about your grades, they'll want to know your progress. Talk to your teacher about providing you with regular report cards detailing your progress in a given subject. You can show these reports to your parents to prove to them that you strive to maintain perfect grades in class.
Step 4. Report any abuse
Any form of abuse should be reported. Fortunately, you can get help from a trustworthy adult to alert the authorities to the situation. You can tell a police officer, therapist, or other authority. Reporting abuse can be emotionally devastating, but it pays off for your own health and well-being.
- How things develop after you report will depend on your situation. You could be placed in a foster home or stay with relatives. Your parents may be required to attend a therapy session to find solutions to certain problems.
- Reporting abuse can be very stressful. However, remember that violent situations are not sustainable in the long term. It is important for you and your parents to receive professional assistance in the event of abuse.