The real mate suffers from a bad reputation from his fellowship to the weight room, but being a real mate doesn't have to be bad. Buddy culture has its origins in American fraternities and can be a great way to become more confident and build strong relationships with other men. You can learn how to be a real buddy and avoid stereotypes that have damaged the image of a real buddy.
Part 1 of 3: Be a real buddy
Step 1. Follow the code
All real friends have a code. This is what unites them, binds them together and creates a solid concept of brotherhood, which sets the true mate apart from other animals in this world. It is you and your pals who invent the code, as well as the penalties for transgressions, but there are generally some universal rules that all real pals follow:
- never flirt with your friend's girlfriend, sister or mother
- help your buddy in all circumstances
- always be serious when you have to help a buddy flirt
- real pals don't ridicule their pals in front of girls
- real homies don't let their homies drive drunk
Step 2. Find friends in your neighborhood and build a small community
Real friends have to stick together. The first condition necessary to be a real friend? Surround yourself with other friends. Find a community of friends to spend time together and help each other. Don't leave a mate behind.
- Many pals join fraternities when they meet at college, but it doesn't have to be. Whenever possible, find male friends who think like you and who you can bond deeply with. You could join a fellowship for this, but you can also find friends at work, at church, at the garage, or at school.
- Indoor sports are great for meeting boys who share your interests. Likewise, if you love the gym, spend some time in the weight room to find friends. You can have friends at school, at the gym, or anywhere else.
Step 3. Learn the distinctive sign of greeting between friends
When two friends meet, they don't shake hands like everyone else. They hug even less. No, they have a distinctive sign. It's like a combination of a hug, fivesome, and arm wrestling. In other words, great for real mates.
- For example, you could hit me five with your friend at chest level, 45 degrees, grabbing each other's hands as if you were ready to wrestle. Don't falter. Tense your muscles. Think about the scene in Predators when Schwarzenegger meets Carl Weathers.
- Then, while holding hands, use your other hand to pat your buddy on the back, once, but hard. The hand you shake will stay between you, so it doesn't feel like a hug. The hug, the sign, whatever name you give it, is a cool gesture.
Step 4. Be Reliable
Got a call from a friend across town with a bloody face after a bar fight? Your romantic evening is over. You have to jump in your car to go help him. You can always count on a real friend, he is always available to help a friend, he arrives in an instant to lend a hand, an advice or a wrench.
Step 5. Say what you think
The world is full of complicated things. A conversation with your friends shouldn't be one of them. Talk openly with your friends and don't be afraid of discussions, full of codes and misunderstandings. If you're upset because your buddy borrowed your car and returned it with the tank emptied, tell him next time, fill the tank mate! If your buddy gets carried away with personal hygiene, it's your job to tell him It's called a shower, go take one. Get straight to the point, don't take the tweezers, say what's on your mind.
Don't be upset if one of your friends behaves this way with you. Be thankful that you have friends who can tell you what you need to hear without wearing gloves. It lets you know what's wrong without fuss, your buddy isn't trying to be vulgar. Don't take it personally if it's the truth
Step 6. Be the unifying element
Just like Joe Montana in the Super Bowl, Andretti in the Indy 500 or Michael Jordan in the playoffs, real mates can't and won't stop. Whether you're at a party, at the gym, or in front of the Xbox, there's always a buddy behind you who calls you back. Work hard to improve your physical health and to refuel, whatever the situation.
- You partied a little too much last night, but today is one of your friends' birthday? The best would be to organize a nice little party in front of The New Star. Seriously now. Get up from the sofa. Drink a Red Bull, take a shower and get ready to celebrate the all-new revolution around your pal's sunshine.
- Don't feel like going in the gym? Get into the ears of Guns' n Roses, Eminem, Led Zeppelin, or whatever song makes you want to move on the weight machine. Don't waste time at the gym. Sweat is just weakness leaving your body.
Step 7. Get inspired by what other friends are doing
Every real mate in the world should have an inspiration, a role model, an idol who excels in the art of being a real mate. Among the classics you will find:
- Ryan Lochte and Michael Phelps
- Tim Tebow, Johnny Manziel, Derek Jeter and Chad Johnson
- Will Smith, Channing Tatum, Matthew McConaughey
- The friends of Epic Meal Time
- Dane Cook, Jim Belushi and Joe Rogan
Step 8. Make every day legendary
A buddy is like a friend, but much better. You have to be in constant search of a new legendary moment, transforming every situation a little bit to make it perfect.
- Don't go out to dinner with your friends, but organize legendary meals. Challenge yourself on amounts of meat to swallow or on spicy foods to swallow and create a competition. Never let the loser down.
- Don't go to class, look for legendary new ways to record information. Do your research to find the best ways to retain what you learn and record your lessons on your iPod while you read in front of the school entrance. Make your classroom presence legendary by answering any questions, debating with the teacher, or pointing out your presence.
- Don't date girls, but go on an adventure. A dinner and a movie? This is what normal people do. Take your girlfriend on a rafting trip or invite the cute waitress at your favorite cafe to a metal concert. Go on a tennis court with a girl you like so she can see what you are capable of.
Part 2 of 3: Adopt the Right Look
Step 1. Take care of yourself
Real mates take their physique and their health seriously. Your physique allows you to defend yourself, compete, and show off your muscles when you wear tight t-shirts. Focus on weight training, cardio and endurance exercises to lose pounds and keep in shape.
- Develop a workout plan and stick to it for several weeks. You will feel that your energy is increasing and you will become the best version of yourself.
- You don't have to be full of muscles to be a real buddy. If you have a stomach or are built like a hanger, you may find yourself some buddies who will be like you. You may not be able to make friends like others do at the gym, but you can use your other good mates to make up for it.
Step 2. Always find a good reason for wearing sportswear
They are easy to wear, cool and go with everything. For most mates, sportswear looks just as good on the court as it does off the court. Take for example basketball shorts, jerseys, Nike shoes and gym sandals. If it is comfortable and designed for sports, then you can wear it on the street. We will often recognize a real friend by what he wears:
- sports pants, with buttons on the side
- sports jerseys, t-shirts, marcels decorated with Greek letters
- a baseball cap worn inside out
Step 3. You can adopt the gentleman look
Real friends from the cities will have slightly different tastes. Avoid the clothes you would wear at concerts in empty parking lots and instead wear the clothes of members of a sailing boat club. Different tastes, but always the same real friends. You can wear for example:
- white polo shirts
- Ralph Lauren cargo shorts
- lacrosse player equipment
- Ray Bans
Step 4. Also try the motocross style
Real buddies who adopt the helmet and metal style thoroughly get along well together. You will find these kind of friends in skateparks. You will recognize them mainly because of the following paraphernalia:
- cargo pants
- skate shoes, like Vans or Airwalks
- flat-brimmed hats
- black socks, pulled up as high as possible
Step 5. Try out the country-cowboy style
The friend of the towns is different from the friend of the fields. If you grew up listening to George Jones in the back of your father's SUV, you're unlikely to end up with a Greek letter print t-shirt. Be realistic. The cowboy style buddy will mainly wear:
- Wranglers, without tying them up
- a cap and a shirt tucked into the pants
- cowboy boots
Part 3 of 3: Avoid stereotypes
Step 1. Don't drink more than you should
An alcoholic coma isn't a sign of a real buddy, it's a sign of a problem with alcohol. While it's true that a group of friends like to share a few beers when they get together, it's important to know your limits and not overstep them. Avoid drinking too much, never drive after drinking, and be responsible for your own life and the lives of others.
Aside from the legal issues that alcohol abuse can bring you, it is also just a bad idea for your health. All of these beers are loaded with empty calories, which means you're going to see your stomach grow and end up at McDonald's in the middle of the night, driven by hunger. Try to limit your alcohol intake
Step 2. Treat women with respect
This is a very important point. If there is one thing that gives you a bad reputation, it's your inability to treat women properly, your habit of humiliating them, your tendency to see them as objects, and your rude behavior in general. Learn to talk to women calmly and courteously.
- Stop bragging. You don't have to hit your chest like a gorilla or a jerk to attract women. Let your natural virility and your charm do, not your inappropriate machismo.
- Don't give women ratings. It shows complete disrespect, it's mean and it could backfire on you.
Step 3. Find yourself a balanced diet
Real mates love real food, don't they? Bacon, fries and pizza. What else is a real mate lacking? The answer is fiber, green vegetables, and vitamins. While the idea of a red meat and potato diet sounds like a great idea for building muscle and hosting barbecues, it is also a direct path to bowel cancer and prostate. Not really cool.
Try to cook as often as possible. Real friends should also be good cooks. Prepare your own meals and eat as healthily as possible. Avoid frozen meals, fast food and any other type of junk food
Step 4. Be careful while driving
You won't look like a cool guy pounding at a red light, fishtailing other cars or honking the cute girls you see on the sidewalk, you will look poor type. A real buddy shouldn't try to compensate for an inferiority complex with reckless driving. Work on your insurance instead of driving like crazy.