Don't be stressed out if you've just added a new number to your contacts, but have no idea how to start a written conversation with that person. All you have to do is take the right steps to make sure everything runs smoothly. If you use the right approach and technique for the first post, you will not only be able to have a successful exchange, but also begin to build a relationship with that person.
Part 1 of 3: Make the first contact by SMS
Step 1. Write to him / her about an activity done together
If you've recently spent time with the person, you can write your first message about what you've been up to together. Using an event as a reference allows you to get his point of view. This is an easy way to start a conversation.
- For example, you can write something like, “wow, I'm so full. This restaurant was really good! "
- You can also say, “wow, Ms. Roberte's class was so boring today. I was falling asleep. "
Step 2. Ask him a question
If you start your first conversation with a question, this gives the person two options: answer you or ignore you. If she replies, be sure to follow the thread of the conversation.
Your question can be simple like: "what is your schedule for this weekend?" "Or" what are your shoes today? I want to take the same pair. "
Step 3. Write something that commands attention
Adding a little humor to the first text is a good way to get feedback. For your first post, avoid writing something trivial like "hi" or "what's up?" "If you write something to her that she isn't used to seeing, there's a good chance she'll answer you.
You can say something like, "I walked 20 blocks from my house for a sandwich and then I realized it was Sunday and the store is closed. How is your day ? "
Step 4. Introduce yourself if the person does not have your number
While a little mystery can spark interest, it can get unpleasant if you hide your identity for a long time. When you have someone's touch, but they don't have yours, it's always good to introduce yourself.
Begin the message with a question like "guess who this is? "And continue with your first name or" good evening, this is Jean. I got your number through Kelly. "
Step 5. Don't waste your time
The only way to start an SMS conversation is to go ahead. Despite the fact that you have their contact, if you are nervous or afraid to write to them, you will never be able to have a conversation with that person. Don't wait long and consolidate the idea in your head. It would be the same as if you hadn't written to her at all.
Part 2 of 3: Sending Great Messages
Step 1. Sometimes use emoticons
They are very useful because the person you are writing to cannot see you or gauge your mood. Some things like sarcasm don't often show up in a text message, so emoticons can let people know what state you are in. Don’t overuse them and don’t use them to replace every word because for many people that may be too much.
- You can say something like, “The chemistry class was very interesting today.:) "
- You can also say this: “Chemistry is the most interesting subject in the world.: | "
Step 2. Take your time between two messages
It might seem silly to take a break from texting, but it will help generate interest. If you write to someone very frequently, it can cause them to withdraw and stop writing to you. Try to act as naturally as possible and write when you have the time. It also allows the other person to reflect on their responses, which makes the conversation more meaningful.
Step 3. Send him pictures of things you do
Pictures are a good way to give the person you're writing with a taste of what you're doing. Remember to keep appropriate images and not to send multiple photos of yourself. If you send interesting pictures, she will want to continue writing with you.
Step 4. Keep the conversation light
Elaborate, detailed conversations on serious topics don't really make sense in texting. So it is best to leave this conversation for the time when you can meet this person or have a phone conversation with them.
- If it opens up to you, don't be afraid to respond. Try to follow her.
- Simple topics include what she does with her day, a show you both love, or a song you love to listen to.
Step 5. Send appropriate messages
Try to determine the level of your relationship. If you're just friends, don't flirt with her or say anything that makes her uncomfortable. However, if you use lighter language more, feel free to flirt with the person.
- If she doesn't respond to your text messages, it will mean that she is either busy or not interested in chatting with you. Either way, don't push it and give her time to respond.
- If you are just friends, you can say something like “hi! I'm really bored. What are you doing now ? "
- If you are in a romantic context, you can write something like "Are you okay with you?" I'm bored. Do you want to keep me company?;) "
Part 3 of 3: Keeping the conversation going
Step 1. Ask him personal questions
If you don't have a topic to talk about, you can get to know her. Read what this person says and ask them questions about what they are writing to you. The more she confides and talks about her life, the more she will want to continue writing with you.
Step 2. Don't be judgmental
Once you have established a certain level of trust, that person will be more inclined to open up to you and talk to you about serious things. The worst thing you can do is judge her by what she shares with you. Instead, try to be understanding instead of judging her.
If you judge her, she may be reluctant to open up to you again and therefore not write to you at all
Step 3. Don't be afraid to be yourself
Don't think too much every time you want to send a message. If you find yourself writing long text messages and then erasing them, stop it and try to relax. The more you stay yourself in your writing, the less pressure you will have for future conversations. Be yourself and don't filter while writing.
Step 4. Follow the movement
A conversation in writing can get interesting sometimes, but there is no one-size-fits-all technique for leading it in this direction. Instead of forcing things, go with the flow and be natural. Read the other person's messages and do the same when they start to confide in you. If you want to offer her a date or ask her a personal or somewhat intimate question, wait for the right time.
Do not quickly get too personal or the person may walk away from you
Step 5. Don't write her a lot of messages if she doesn't respond
Texting a lot in a row or becoming intrusive can cause the person to ignore you and stop responding. So stay calm and wait patiently for his response. If she doesn't respond quickly, it may mean she's busy.